


Tearing Us Apart

by KittyBandit



Series: Sleeping with the Enemy [5]
Category: D.Gray-man
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Anal Sex, Angst, Attempted Rape/Non-Con, Death, Drama, M/M, Mixed feelings, Oral Sex, Pining, Romance, Rough Oral Sex, Rough Sex, Sex, Violence, canon compliant pre chapter 223, sex injuries
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-19
Updated: 2017-08-21
Packaged: 2018-12-17 10:13:55
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 3
Words: 29,200
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11849448
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KittyBandit/pseuds/KittyBandit
Summary: Final installment of the Sleeping with the Enemy Series.Lavi and Tyki have run off with Allen in search of a way to remove their Noah memories. Allen has a lead, but it’s a long way to Liverpool, especially while bickering amongst themselves.





	1. The Beginning of the End

**Author's Note:**

> Welcome to the last installment of the Sleeping with the Enemy series. If you haven’t read the first 4 installments, I would do so before reading this or nothing will make sense. XD I know all the other works were one chapter long, but since I kind of went overboard, I have 3 chapters to unveil for you all in the coming days. The wait shouldn’t be long, though.

Lavi covered his head and ducked down as the explosion rocked over the grassy knoll. They had been ambushed by a horde of Akuma just on the outskirts of town, and the fight continued as ferociously as it had begun.

“Watch what you’re doing, boy!” Tyki shouted, narrowly dodging a swipe from one of the level twos that had managed to stay alive until the end.

“You’re the one that needs to pay attention!” Allen shouted back, cutting down another level one and jumping in to help Tyki. Another explosion hit too close to them, and Allen had to use Crown Clown to shield them from it.

Lavi felt impotent, and his right hand kept reaching for a weapon on his hip that didn’t exist anymore. He had to keep his head down, hiding out of view as Allen and Tyki fought. They worked well enough together. Tyki forced the Akuma to stop with his commanding powers as a Noah while Allen dispatched them with his Innocence. The scraps they’d gotten into since they’d ran off together would’ve been easier if they let Tyki take care of the Akuma, but Allen refused to allow that. He knew what happened to an Akuma’s bound souls if they weren’t released with the purifying power of Innocence. Allen refused to budge on the subject, even to the detriment of his health.

The group of twenty or so level ones, twos, and threes had dwindled down to a handful, and Lavi prayed for the fight to be over soon. He felt so useless every time they had run into any Akuma or Noah, though they’d only seen the other Noah on one occasion, and had managed to escape without much of an issue. But ever since then, the Akuma attacks had come quicker and more forceful, and Lavi wasn’t sure how much longer they could handle the constant barrage of surprise attacks.

And with each ambush, Lavi felt more pathetic than before. Without his hammer, he had no way to fight or even protect himself. Being so completely reliant on Allen and Tyki wore on him like wet leather on chapped skin. He’d been frustrated about the issue for months now, ever since they had run away together in search of a way to remove the Noah memories from his companions. Unfortunately, leaving wasn’t as simple as he had hoped it would be.

“Are you blind?!” Tyki yelled, kicking one of the level two Akuma towards Allen with a glare. “I’m tired of waiting for you to finish a fight. If you don’t hurry up, I’ll take care of the rest myself.”

“Don’t you dare,” Allen growled out, another Akuma killed with his claw. He grit his teeth and jumped towards the next target.

Lavi poked his head over the edge of the small hill, checking to see how they were doing. Just a few more Akuma to go. He swallowed at the nervous lump in his throat, watching with intense focus as Tyki and Allen reluctantly worked together. It was an unusual pairing, but Lavi was surprised how well they could work together given the animosity he’d seen between them lately.

The high-pitched sound of an Akuma cannon just behind him left Lavi’s heart in his throat. He jerked around, back to the grass as he looked down the barrel of a level one’s weapon. The ballooned lump of dark matter charged the weapon, ready to fire. As soon as Lavi’s brain caught up to his situation, he could only think of one thing in his adrenaline filled haze: Run.

He twisted out of the way and scrambled to his feet, running away from the Akuma and heading for a copse of firs, hoping to lose the bulbous demon in the trees. It followed after, finding Lavi an easier target than the others.

Tyki caught sight of him first, yellow eyes wide as he saw the Akuma trailing behind the redhead. “Lavi!”

The call grabbed Allen’s attention, and he sucked in a breath when he saw what was happening. Without a thought he ran after Lavi, boots digging up chunks of dirt and grass with each hurried step.

Lavi ran, legs and arms pumping at breakneck speed to escape the Akuma on his heels. The treeline was only a few yards away when his foot caught on a hole in the ground, likely some small animal’s home. He twisted his ankle, crashing against the ground and tumbling through the long grass. He tried to get up again, but his ankle gave under his weight. On his back, he looked up to see that same level one, staring at him with cold, dead eyes as it aimed the cannon again. Lavi squeezed his eye shut and prayed it would be over quickly.

But the pain never came. Instead, something crashed on top of him, forcing the air out of his lungs. He heard the shots fire, explosions, and smelled that rancid stench of dusted Akuma that always hung in the air after they were killed. When Lavi opened his eye, all he saw was white.

White and red.

“L-Lavi? Are you o-okay?”

Allen’s voice shook like his body did, and when Lavi pushed him back, he saw the blood seeping through the fabric of his shirt just on his right shoulder. The black pentacles grew across his neck and face, marring his white skin. It was then that Lavi realized Allen had taken the Akuma’s bullet for him.

“Al! Al, are you crazy?!” He pushed Allen off him, laying him down on the grass. Allen winced as he was moved, but didn’t complain. Lavi stripped back the bloodied fabric to check the wound. It wasn’t as bad as he had thought, but he still needed treatment.

Allen chuckled. “C-Couldn’t let you get hit.”

Lavi shook his head as he began ripping up strips of Allen’s already ruined shirt. “You shouldn’t have done it.” As he wrapped the wound and worked on stopping the blood flow, he caught sight of Tyki coming towards them. Lavi didn’t miss the furious look on his face, or how heavy his footfalls were.

Allen coughed and tried to sit up, but Lavi forced him back down against the ground. “What happened to the rest of the Akuma?” he asked, looking at Tyki as he stopped next to them. He had their discarded packs in hand and dropped them near Allen’s head.

“Be careful—” Lavi started, but shrunk back when Tyki glared at him. He hadn’t seen him this pissed in a long time, and it left his blood cold.

“I took care of them, like _you_ couldn’t,” Tyki snapped at Allen, his jaw clenched tight.

Allen stiffened up at his words, eyebrows pinched together. “I told you not to kill them! If you destroy an Akuma with something other than Innocence—”

“Spare me your goodie-goodie lecture, boy!” Tyki bent down and yanked open one of the bags, violently rifling through it. “If I hadn’t taken care of them, we’d all be captured or dead by now. But _please_ , tell me again about how I shouldn’t have saved our asses.”

Allen glared up at Tyki, unbothered by Lavi wrapping his wound. The black pentacles still danced over his pale skin, but slowly faded as his parasitic Innocence purified his blood. Had Lavi been hit, he would’ve been dust by now. “You destroyed those souls, Tyki. They can’t be released. You don’t get to decide—”

“Shut up and save your breath. I’m _not_ listening.” Tyki pulled out a wad of bandages and a fresh shirt, handing both to Lavi.

Allen narrowed his eyes. “If you don’t like it, you’re _more_ than welcome to go back home.”

Tyki leaned in closer, barely keeping his teeth from grinding together. “You would fucking love that, wouldn’t—”

“Enough!” Lavi shouted, so flustered with their bickering that his hands were shaking. He fastened the last knot in the bandages and helped Allen to his feet and into the fresh shirt. “We don’t have time for this. Let’s get to town before we’re ambushed again. Allen needs to see a doctor.” He pulled Allen’s uninjured arm over his shoulder and eased him back towards the road. The fight had taken them off course nearly a quarter of a mile.

“Thank you, Lavi,” Allen said, his voice softening. He avoided looking at or speaking to Tyki, but the tension remained stifling.

Tyki grabbed their bags and cursed under his breath before stalking off ahead. He didn’t bother to wait for them as he headed back to the road.

Lavi took a deep breath and ignored Tyki for the moment. He could only deal with one crisis at a time. “Can you walk? I think we’ve stopped the bleeding for the moment, but if you feel faint, I can carry you.”

Allen smiled and it looked more genuine than it had in days. “I should be okay. Besides, you’re a little banged up yourself. That was quite the tumble you took.”

Lavi didn’t want to admit it, but he was definitely hurt. His ankle ached with each step, and he had skinned his palms and knees when he had fallen. He didn’t want to think about all the bruises he’d have come tomorrow.

“I’ll be fine. You’re the one taking bullets for me,” Lavi said, trying to lighten the mood. He chuckled, but even he could hear the strain in his own voice.

“And I would do it again if I had to,” Allen added, his voice softer than before. He tightened his fingers into Lavi’s shirt as they limped along through the grass.

Lavi swallowed, his stomach twisting in a hot knot of guilt. These quiet, soft moments between them reminded him too much of how they’d been before everything went to Hell, before everything was too complicated. He ignored it, shoved the painful mix of feelings down into his guts to fester.

“C’mon,” he said, tightening his grip on Allen. “Let’s hurry up and get to town before you bleed all over my last shirt.”

Allen laughed. “Right. We can’t have that, can we?”

 

xXxXxXx

 

The inn room was cramped, the two small beds barely fitting into the space without butting up against each other. Their packs were tossed back by the far wall, just under the window. Lavi had been fussing over Allen for nearly an hour since they’d returned from seeing the physician. The doctor stitched him up without issues and he would be fine with some rest, but the way Lavi fretted about him left Tyki off-kilter. He had a burning sensation in his chest that refused to abate, and it only grew when he looked at the redhead.

Tyki kicked at the blankets on the bed, unable to find a comfortable position. It was late, and he wanted to sleep and forget about this whole damned day. He tried to close his eyes against the last lit lamp in the room, but every time Lavi moved or he heard the creak of the bedsprings next to him, it set his nerves on edge. Finally, he couldn’t take the tiny noises or the cold expanse of mattress next to him anymore.

“Leave him alone already. He’s fucking unconscious from the medicine the doctor gave him. Stop mothering him.”

Lavi huffed, his shoulders stiffening up. “I’m just checking his bandages. It’ll only be another minute.”

“He’s not gonna die, Red. Give it a rest.” Tyki grabbed one of the pillows off the bed and tossed it at him. It smacked him lightly on the backside before landing on the floor. He heard Lavi sigh before bending over and grabbing it. When he turned to face Tyki, a frown marred his face.

“What the fuck is your problem? You’ve been riding my ass all day, and you were a complete asshole to Allen.” He threw the pillow back at Tyki, hitting him in the chest.

“Oh, I haven’t even begun to ride your a—”

“ _Tyki_.”

The exhausted tone in Lavi’s voice swayed him enough to drop the attitude. He let out a slow breath through his nose, eyes on Lavi. “I don’t have a problem.”

“Try again, and this time don’t lie to me. I can tell the difference—I’m a Bookman.”

“ _Former_ Bookman,” Tyki clarified.

Lavi said nothing in return and stood there, staring at Tyki with an unwavering gaze. The silence ate away at Tyki’s nerves. He knew what was wrong, what he was feeling, but he wasn’t about to share that with anyone, especially Lavi.

He’d been feeling a lot of things lately—too many things for his own good—and they all revolved around the redhead. But today drove the nail into his heart for how everything had turned out. It didn’t help that he’d been worried about Lavi for months now as they traveled to Liverpool in search of a way to remove the Noah memories from him and Allen. They’d been tracked by the other Noah and Akuma alike, and without his Innocence to fight with, Lavi was as helpless as a bunny when they got into a battle. Today hadn’t been the only close call he had had with the Akuma, but it had been by far the closest. It left Tyki feeling weak and worried, and he couldn’t stop thinking about how he’d almost lost Lavi today—

If it hadn’t been for Allen Walker.

And there was the salt in his wound, another insecurity that gnawed on him like a dog with a bone. _Allen_ had saved Lavi, _not_ him. Allen had risked his life—hurt himself—all for Lavi. And Lavi, in turn, doted on him for it. It rubbed Tyki the wrong way, and ate at his nerves until they were frayed and sharp like wires.

He should have saved Lavi. Lavi should be paying attention to him, _not Allen_. But like hell he was going to admit to feeling jealous.

The silence had gone on long enough to feel awkward. Tyki sighed and grabbed Lavi’s wrist, tugging him down into the bed. Lavi let out an undignified squeak when he lost his balance and tumbled against Tyki. He fell into his lap, and nearly knocked him back against the mattress from the force of his fall. Lavi sucked in a breath, likely to complain, but Tyki cut him off before he could begin.

“Stop being so reckless. You’re gonna get yourself killed if you’re not careful.”

Lavi blinked, the stiffness in his muscles relaxing as he sat back on Tyki’s thighs. He watched quietly for a moment before his hands curled into the disheveled sheets. “Were you worried? About me?”

The question hung in the air between them, and Tyki wanted to deny the accusation. It was too difficult to return Lavi’s gaze, and he stared at the front of his dirty shirt instead. A lump formed in his throat and he knew that he couldn’t quite say the words or admit it. He hated feeling this vulnerable almost as much as the thought of Lavi getting hurt.

Instead, he reached up and ran his hand through Lavi’s hair. The deep red strands barely touched his shoulders. “Your hair’s gotten longer.” He knew he was blatantly avoiding Lavi’s question, so much so that there was no way Lavi didn’t catch it as well. But instead of pressing the previous subject, Lavi just leaned into the touch.

“Kinda hard to cut it while we’re on the run.”

Tyki lay back on the mattress, pulling Lavi with him. A smirk twitched up on his lips. “Don’t cut it. I like it.”

“Oh?” Lavi asked, shifting as he braced his hands against the bed. Tyki’s hands were still in his hair, stroking the soft strands. “Maybe I’ll leave it long, then…”

It was subtle, but just the thought of Lavi keeping his hair longer for _him_ left Tyki buzzing. He slid a hand to the back of Lavi’s neck and pulled him in for a kiss, deep and lingering. Lavi stiffened up at the touch, fingers digging into the sheets. Tyki slid his free hand over Lavi’s backside, hips rutting up into Lavi’s with obvious want. Lavi let out a soft moan before pulling away.

“We shouldn’t.” Lavi’s gaze slid over to the other bed. “Allen’s right there, and—”

“Who cares. He’s dead to the world. He won’t hear a thing.” Tyki rolled them on the bed, now pinning Lavi against the sheets as he grinned down at him. “C’mon, I know you want me. I can feel it.” To illustrate his point, he ran a hand over Lavi’s crotch, feeling up his half-hard cock still trapped in the confines of his pants.

Lavi flushed, embarrassed as he averted his gaze and stared at the wall. “That doesn’t make it right to do it.”

“What? Don’t want your precious Allen to know how much you like it?” Tyki felt that hot knot of jealousy in his guts again, the one that grew whenever he knew Lavi was thinking about Allen. He clenched his jaw, the grin on his face painfully fake. “Afraid he’ll wake up and see what a slut you are for me?”

He watched Lavi’s eyebrows pinch tight and his lips dip down into a frown. “Knock it off. Don’t talk to me like that.”

“Why? Say it’s not true.” Tyki pressed in closer, his lips brushing Lavi’s ear as he rubbed their hips together. His voice lowered into a husky whisper. “Say you don’t love when I fuck you raw and senseless. Say you don’t want me to bite you and bruise you until you’re nothing but a screaming mess under me.”

Lavi swallowed, his hands digging into Tyki’s shirt. He didn’t push him away, though, and Tyki could hear his breath coming in faster, felt his heart beating like a drum in his chest. “T-Tyki, stop…” The words came out stuttered and weak.

“Stop what? This?” Tyki asked, running his tongue up he shell of Lavi’s ear as he slipped his hand between them and palmed his growing erection. He smoothed his hand over the taut fabric for a moment before popping the button and pulling open his pants. “You don’t want me to stop. You want it—you just don’t want to admit it.”

Lavi’s hips arched into Tyki’s touch, and when his fingers finally wrapped around his hard, hot flesh, the redhead whined into his shoulder. “Tyki…”

“Say it, Red,” Tyki mumbled, moving his lips down Lavi’s neck and sucking dark bruises into the skin. “Say you want me.”

Biting his lip, Lavi turned his head. He looked towards the other bed, where Allen lay. That knot of jealousy tightened and Tyki bit hard on his shoulder, nearly drawing blood. Lavi hissed in pain, jerking away.

Tyki pulled back enough to meet his gaze. He grabbed Lavi’s chin forcing him to look at only him as he continued to pump his erection. “Say it,” he repeated, his tone low and threatening as he stared down at Lavi. He felt a heavy bead of precum ooze from the tip of Lavi’s cock, dribbling over his fingers.

Lavi sucked in a breath, a shudder running deep down his spine. He closed his eye for a moment, his lips trembling as Tyki continued to grip his chin and stroke his dick. “Y-Yes…”

“Yes, what?”

“I want you,” Lavi said, swallowing hard and gasping as his hips jerked up into Tyki’s touch. “I want you, Tyki.”

Satisfied, Tyki let go of Lavi’s chin and swooped down for a rough kiss. He forced his tongue into Lavi’s mouth, stealing his breath and stroking him faster. He felt Lavi’s moans vibrating on his tongue, swallowing them down like the finest wine.

He enjoyed teasing Lavi for a few more minutes before sitting up and ripping at Lavi’s clothes. It had been too long since they’d fooled around and Tyki wanted it to be done right—skin on skin.

Lavi lay back on the bed, staring up at him as he was stripped. When Tyki finished, he got up off the bed and rummaged through one of their packs until he found a tub of ointment. With a grin, he tossed it on the bed and yanked off his own clothes before sliding back on top of the redhead, kissing him once more. Their mutual erections rubbed up against each other, and they both groaned at the friction.

Tyki straddled Lavi’s hips, working their lengths together as he kissed down his neck and sucked more bruises into his skin. He marked everywhere he could—biting, sucking, grabbing, and scratching at Lavi until there was no doubt that he’d been thoroughly fucked. He did it selfishly, knowing full well that Allen would see the marks tomorrow and _know_ what they’d been up to. He wanted him to know, wanted everyone to know that Lavi was his and _his alone_.

He took his time, making his way over every inch of the redhead’s body. There was no place that Tyki hadn’t touched with either his hands or his mouth. He hummed against Lavi’s skin, sucking one of his nipples and kneading his ass.

“Tyki,” Lavi whispered, threading his fingers into his dark hair and tugging gently. His hips rocked up with a dizzy need.

With a chuckle, Tyki worked his way down Lavi’s body until his breath teased at the hot flesh of his cock. “You’re so easy, Red. I can read you like a book.” He ran a finger up Lavi’s shaft and listened to him choke on a gasp. Without warning, he leaned in and took Lavi into his mouth, sucking down his dick and massaging it with his tongue. Every noise he pulled from him was the most beautiful music. Tyki soaked it all in, each groan and moan and wanton gasp. Each sound stroked his ego, reminded him that he was the only one that could make the redhead unravel like that. He was the only one that made Lavi cry for more. He was the one Lavi wanted.

And he was going to keep it that way.

Sliding his mouth off Lavi’s throbbing member, Tyki looked down at him with a sly smile. “Do you wanna fuck me?”

Lavi blinked, still buzzing from the oral stimulation. He shook his head, confused. “What?”

Tyki grabbed the tub of ointment and pushed it into Lavi’s hand. “Fuck me. You know you want to.”

Lavi opened his mouth to speak, but no words came out. He looked from the tub and back to Tyki, confusion still clear on his face. “You—” He paused, swallowing hard. Tyki watched him intensely, waiting for a response. “We’ve never done that before…”

“So? Let’s do it now. C’mon, fuck me, _Lavi_.”

He saw Lavi visibly shiver as soon as he used his name. Tyki didn’t say it often, and it was usually only to get a rise out of him. This time was no different, and he could already see the hunger in his eye.

Lavi said nothing, but Tyki watched his trembling hands pop open the tub and dip his fingers into the ointment. He slipped his hand between Tyki’s legs, cautiously fingering his entrance. Tyki smirked down at him, amused by the half-aroused half-petrified look on his face.

“So gentle, Red. You afraid I’ll break?” he asked, spreading his thighs wider as he leaned in close and kissed Lavi’s neck again, sucking on the already bruised skin.

Lavi pressed one finger in, and Tyki stiffened at the intrusion. The lubricant made the stretch easier, but it still felt weird. He wasn’t used to having something inside him.

“Maybe I am,” Lavi mumbled. The sincerity in his voice gave Tyki pause. He had been rough with Lavi, even cruel at times, and this genuine concern left him feeling guilty.

“Don’t be,” Tyki said, pushing himself down against Lavi’s finger. When Lavi tried to pull away, Tyki grabbed his hand and held it firm. Lavi looked up at him, breath caught in his throat. Tyki met his gaze, calm but stern. “I told you to fuck me, Red. Don’t play nice. I want you to wreck me.”

Lavi swallowed, but stopped trying to pull away. He lay there, quietly watching Tyki. Tyki thought he was about to protest again when he felt the second finger slip into his backside. He moaned, resting his forehead against Lavi’s shoulder as the redhead fingered his ass.

With a breathless chuckle, Tyki dug his nails into Lavi’s shoulders to keep his hands from shaking. “C’mon, Red. You can do better than that. Make me feel it.”

There was a moment of silence, and Tyki was sure he’d pushed Lavi too far. The fingers were pulled from his ass, but before he could complain, he was on his back with Lavi pinning him to the bed. Lavi hitched one of Tyki’s legs over his shoulder and went back to stretching him. Tyki gasped at the intrusion, back arching off the bed. Lavi’s face was set tight with lust and determination. Two fingers were quickly joined by a third, and Tyki bit back a cry. The stretch burned and ached, but he refused to take back his demands. He wanted Lavi to have him, to fuck him as hard and ruthlessly as Tyki had fucked him. Maybe if he gave him that, Tyki would stop feeling guilty.

Maybe if he gave him that, Lavi wouldn’t leave him for Allen.

The painful stretching only lasted a few minutes, and when Lavi pulled his fingers free, Tyki felt that emptiness inside. It was worse than the discomfort, and he hated how he craved it. Lavi grabbed the ointment again, smoothing a hefty amount on his hardness, and pressed it against Tyki’s entrance. He only held back for a second before plunging in all the way.

Tyki groaned and nearly bit through his lip when Lavi seated himself deep inside. He panted, eyes screwed shut against the pain. Was this how it always felt? Was this what he put Lavi through night after night?

Lavi pulled his hair, tilting his chin back and capturing his lips with a searing kiss. He worked his hips, rocking into Tyki with a steady pace. Tyki whined into his mouth, but the redhead only tightened his grip, kissing him harder and drinking down his cries.

Lavi thrust faster, his hips working into Tyki roughly. Needing something to hold onto, Tyki wrapped his arms around Lavi, grasping at his back and scoring it with his nails. Lavi broke off their kiss, burying his face into Tyki’s neck as he moaned and fucked him harder.

And then, Tyki felt it. Lavi had shifted his hips just right, and he could feel a pressure as he brushed up against that sweet spot inside. Tyki sucked in a breath, nails digging deeper into Lavi’s shoulders as he tried to swallow the moan that bubbled up from his throat. It felt good, edging away the pain he’d been feeling and leaving his guts a mushy, warm mess. His cock, still hard and unattended, leaked precum as it rubbed against his and Lavi’s stomachs.

“Fuck, Red,” Tyki groaned out, back arching. “Feels so good.”

Lavi grinned against his shoulder, teeth grazing over his skin. He snapped his hips up, earning him a gasp from Tyki, and once he found the right spot to hit, he rammed into it again and again, until Tyki’s eyes crossed.

It was so hard to keep their voices down that Tyki wasn’t sure if their unconscious roommate would wake and see them in the midst of a passionate fucking, but he was hard-pressed to admit that the idea didn’t excite him. Maybe he wanted Allen to see it—to have the proof that Lavi was his.

Not stopping the rough pace, Lavi dug his nails into Tyki’s hips as he watched the Noah unravel under him. His lips quirked up into a smirk. “Who’s the slut now?” he asked between breaths, fucking Tyki harder and harder.

Each pass came so fast that Tyki couldn’t tell if Lavi was thrusting in or out of him at any given moment. All he knew was it hurt so good and his body was burning up from the tension in his muscles. He couldn’t even bother to snap back at the redhead when he threw his earlier words back in his face. He was too far gone.

A few more minutes passed and Lavi gasped, hips losing their steady rhythm. Tyki felt a sudden warmth flooding his insides as Lavi cursed under his breath, head tucked against his sweaty neck. He came, rutting into Tyki with abandon as he spilled himself inside him. When he finished, he collapsed against Tyki’s chest, clinging to him tightly.

Arousal still burned hot in Tyki’s veins and he tightened his fingers into Lavi’s hair as the redhead fought to catch his breath. “Is that it?” he asked, rocking his hips up against Lavi’s spent body. “I expected more from you.”

Lavi chuckled. “Now I know why you like fucking me so much,” he mumbled, crawling up on his hands and knees, then reaching for the tub of ointment.

Tyki watched him with a curious gaze as Lavi popped the tub open and smoothed the lubricant over Tyki’s still hard arousal. He groaned at the touch, closing his eyes as Lavi stroked him three times before letting go again. He didn’t open them again until he heard Lavi let out a pitiful groan, and the sight before him left him breathless. Lavi worked his fingers into his own ass, stretching himself with ease as he bit his lip to keep some of the deeper groans from reverberating in the room. Once he was finished, he crawled on top of Tyki, legs on either side of his hips, then sat down and impaled himself onto Tyki’s throbbing cock.

After being untouched since they’d began, and having his ass rammed into next week, Tyki could do nothing but moan and toss his head back against the sheets as Lavi encompassed him. Fuck, he knew he couldn’t last long, not with all the teasing he’d endured, and the feeling of Lavi’s seed leaking out of his ass while he straddled his dick left Tyki hot and bothered. It was too sexy, too intimate, and when Lavi started to move, Tyki bit his lip to suck down a cry of delight.

Lavi worked his hips, thrusting himself onto Tyki’s hardness. He let out pitiful cries with each movement, no doubt overstimulated after his own orgasm. Tyki watched him bounce up and down on his lap, taking him in with ease. He was gorgeous, beautiful, and Tyki couldn’t keep his eyes off him.

Reaching up, Tyki ran his hands over Lavi’s taut stomach, dragging nails over his hips and inner thighs. He felt the tremor of his muscles as he continued to fuck himself on Tyki, and after a few minutes, his dick grew hard once more. “You look so good with my cock inside you,” Tyki mumbled, grinning up at Lavi.

Lavi panted, feeling the deep stretch as he bottomed out on Tyki thrust after thrust. He stared down at Tyki, his mouth open as he groaned against each movement. Reaching down, he wrapped a hand around himself, crying out at the touch. His cock was already red and hard again, and Tyki’s eyes widened at the sight of the Lavi wrecking himself on top of him.

Unable to just lay back and watch, he reached out and pushed Lavi’s hands away, pumping his length. Lavi cried out again, louder this time, his eye squeezed shut as he continued to bounce on Tyki’s cock. “Ahhh…” he whined, fingers digging into the flesh of his thighs. His hips lost their rhythm, and Tyki could see him struggle to keep upright.

Tyki slid a hand along Lavi’s jaw, curling fingers around the back of his neck. When Lavi opened his eye and returned the gaze, Tyki pulled him down for a long, deep kiss. His tongue invaded Lavi’s mouth, swallowing his muffled moans. Tyki hummed in pleasure, his hand slipping away from Lavi’s length and grabbing at his hip. When he pulled his lips away, he grinned up at Lavi. Without a word, he rolled their bodies on the bed, pinning Lavi to the mattress.

Lavi’s green eye went wide as he looked up at Tyki hovering over him with a ridiculous smirk. Before he could comment, Tyki went in hard, pounding into Lavi’s ass relentlessly. The redhead choked on a cry, and shoved a hand into his mouth before he could be too loud.

“C’mon, Red. Let me hear you scream,” Tyki said, a moan punctuating his sentence as he worked himself into Lavi at a rough, fast pace. He could already feel Lavi’s body stiffening up under him, strained in ecstasy. Tyki tugged the hand from his mouth, and was greeted with a beautiful gasp from Lavi’s lips.

Lavi watched him, eye half-lidded and his chest heaving. “T-Tyki no. I don’t want to—”

“Yes, you do,” Tyki insisted, thrusting his hips harder just to pull another moan out of Lavi. “You only want to be quiet because of _him_.”

The accusation hung in the air between them, but Tyki never stopped his frantic pace. The slap of wet skin on skin echoed in the room. “I—” Lavi started, but another hard thrust left him crying out. Tyki grinned, knowing he hit him deep enough to knock the wind from his lungs.

Leaning in, Tyki latched his lips onto Lavi’s neck, sucking his already red and purple skin. The mottled bruises and bite marks littered his shoulders and neck. “I want to hear you beg,” he whispered hoarsely into Lavi’s ear before pulling the pierced lobe between his lips to roll it over his tongue. Lavi shivered and groaned, his hips canting up against Tyki’s. He slipped his hand between his and Tyki’s stomachs, stroking himself fast and dirty. A moan rumbled in the back of his throat.

“T-Tyki,” Lavi whined, his breath hitching on his name, “Please…”

One of Tyki’s hands gripped Lavi’s hips tighter, and he licked up his neck as he continued to fuck him. “Please _what_ , Red?”

“P-Please,” Lavi stuttered out, spreading his legs wider. “Fuck me harder.”

Tyki felt his stomach twist pleasantly at Lavi’s words. He kissed Lavi, rutting his hips harder than before and rocking into the redhead with such force that the bedframe rattled against the wall. It only took a moment at that impossibly painful pace to make Lavi cum, plastering his and Tyki’s stomachs in white. The mess between them only pushed him further, and Tyki fucked Lavi with abandon, plunging in and out of him recklessly. Lavi moaned helplessly under him, fingernails digging into his sides as his limbs shook and his back arched against him.

When Tyki came, he nearly blacked out from the suddenness of it. His vision went white as his hips rocked into Lavi slower and more erratic than before. By the time he’d finished, cum was already oozing from Lavi’s abused hole, and the redhead was left panting and whining against the sheets. Tyki pulled out, the slick sound accompanied by his own pitiful groan. He collapsed next to Lavi on the bed, breathing hard as he brushed his sweat laden bangs from his forehead. There were both a sticky mess, cum and sweat covering their bodies. Tyki didn’t mind the stained sheets or dirty skin. He pulled Lavi close and kissed him deeply, tongue in his mouth and a moan rumbling in the back of his throat. Lavi submitted easily, a hand curling along Tyki’s neck.

When the kiss broke apart, Tyki pulled Lavi up against his chest and held him close. He was surprised how quickly Lavi relaxed against him, head resting on his shoulder and arm around his waist. Tyki carded his fingers through Lavi’s sweaty hair, smoothing out the strands and untangling some of the knots. They said nothing, only the sound of their softening breaths filling the darkened room. Before Tyki could think to even grab the sheet to cover them for the night, he fell asleep tangled in Lavi’s limbs.

 

xXxXxXx

 

The sounds of shuffling and something scraping against the wood flooring edged Lavi out of sleep. With a groan, he turned, lifting his head up from the pillow just enough to see what was making the racket. He wanted to keep sleeping, but his body ached from his and Tyki’s late night activities. Every position was uncomfortable, and no matter what, he couldn’t fall back asleep.

When he cracked open his good eye, he saw Allen. His back was to Lavi as he shoved his clothes and supplies into his travel pack, obviously flustered. It took Lavi a moment for his brain to make the connection, but when he did he felt a stab of anxiety in his chest. He was still visibly naked and roughed up, as he and Tyki hadn’t bothered to clean themselves up before falling asleep last night.

Lavi sat up, dizzy from the suddenness of the movement, and pulled the sheet up to cover himself better. He didn’t even have to look at his body to know it was littered in bruises, bites, and scratches, tell-tale signs of a night spent with Tyki. He swallowed, his throat dry and parched as he watched Allen pack his bag. “A-Al… I—”

“I’m going down to get some food from the kitchens before we leave,” Allen snapped, cutting Lavi off and refusing to meet his gaze. “Meet me there when you two are decent.”

The cold bite of Allen’s tone left Lavi frozen in place. He gripped at the dirty sheets, hesitating as he tried to find the right words to say. “Allen, wait. I’m sorry.”

Before Allen could reply, Tyki hummed and sat up in bed. He draped himself over Lavi, arms curled around his lanky frame, and rested his chin on the redhead’s shoulder. Lavi stiffened at the contact as Tyki blatantly fondled his chest and hips.

“Ooh, seems someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed.” He kept his yellow eyes on Allen, the smirk nearly breaking his face in two. Allen tried to ignore him, but Tyki continued to run his mouth. “Maybe you just need a good roll in the sheets to loosen up, boy? Care to join us one of these nights? I’m sure Red won’t mind being passed between us.”

Allen said nothing, but the frown on his face deepened as he shot Tyki a scornful look. He left the room, slamming the door behind him. Tyki chuckled and Lavi felt him kiss over his neck and shoulders as he smoothed his hands over his skin.

“He’s pissed,” Tyki said, amusement in his voice.

Lavi jerked out of his grasp, anger burning hot in his chest. “What the fuck is wrong with you?! Why did you do that?!” He stumbled out of bed, legs weak and uncoordinated as the sheets untangled from his naked form. He turned to Tyki and scowled at him.

Tyki leaned back, not bothering to cover himself up and sat unabashedly staring back at the redhead. “What did I do?”

“Are you kidding me, Tyki? Seriously?!” Lavi stomped towards the small washroom and began to clean up as he continued to berate him. “There’s no reason for you to shove it in his face. You’re just being an asshole for no reason.”

“And why should I be nice?” Tyki asked, still lounging in bed, the sheets barely covering him. A touch of anger tainted his tone as he stared at the washroom doorway. “You’re _mine_. I’m just making sure he knows it.”

Lavi had only started the water in the tub when he caught Tyki’s words. He grabbed a dry towel and cinched it around his waist before stomping back into the main room. He glared over at Tyki, his green eye narrowed. “Let’s get one thing straight here. I am _not_ a possession you can own.” He could feel his heart beating faster, the anger and anxiety bubbling up inside him like black tar. They’d gone over this time and again, but peace had never been found between the three of them. “Allen is my friend and I care about him. Stop terrorizing him and have some goddamned tact for once.”

Pushing back the sheets, Tyki sat on the edge of the bed and stared back at Lavi with a distrustful gaze. “The only reason you care so much what he thinks is because you’re still in love with him. And he clearly has feelings for you, too.”

Lavi turned around then, his shoulders tight as he headed back into the washroom to bathe. “I’m not talking about this with you right now.” He closed the door and dropped the towel from around his waist before dipping into the half full tub. The water scalded his abused skin, but he ignored the pain as he grabbed a washcloth to scrub at the dried cum on his stomach. He suddenly felt sick, like his stomach was full of rotten food.

Of course, the closed door meant nothing to Tyki. He phased through the wall, naked and irate as he stormed to the bathtub. He glared down at Lavi as the water continued to pour into the ceramic tub. “If you’re so worried about his feelings, why don’t you go fuck him, too?” The words were spit with such venom that Lavi visibly shrank back from him. “I don’t fucking care, but I guarantee you I’m the better lay.”

“Tyki, _please_ ,” Lavi begged, avoiding his gaze as he finally shut off the faucet. “I can’t do this again.”

“Yeah? Well, too damn bad. You started it by taking his side again.”

Lavi squeezed the wet washcloth in his hands, fingers shaking from the tight grip. “I’m not taking sides! Why do you keep insisting I am?” He looked up at Tyki, and even as upset as he was, he could still see the hurt in those yellow eyes. Lavi softened, that sick feeling in his guts doubling in intensity. “I’m with you, Tyki. I’m sleeping _with_ you. Why do you keep doubting me?”

Tyki let out a breath and moved away from the tub. He watched Lavi intensely for a long moment before speaking again. “I may have your body, but he has your heart.”

Lavi didn’t know what to say. He couldn’t speak, couldn’t breathe as he looked back at Tyki. He wanted to deny it, to tell him it wasn’t true, but the words wouldn’t come—they died in his throat, suffocated by his own doubts.

Without a word, Tyki turned and left, phasing through the door the same way he entered. He could hear shuffling and movement in the other room, then silence. Lavi swallowed, a lump stuck in his throat as he leaned against the edge of the bathtub. “…Tyki?” he called, his voice timid and weak. “Tyki?” There was no answer.

His stomach churned again, and Lavi spilled its contents on the floor, choking on the bitter bile. When he finished, he sunk in the tub and lay back to stare at the ceiling, the stench of fresh vomit hanging in the air.


	2. Labyrinthine Lies

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 2 and 2/3 there. Thank you all for your comments so far. 
> 
> Reminder, please pay attention to the tags and warning--this fic is darker and I just wanted everyone to keep that in mind.
> 
> Anywho, here's some more pain. XD

The old shack creaked and groaned against the wind, the slats in the walls not close enough together to keep the air from seeping through. Lavi stirred a pot of weak soup over the old hearth. Even with how little they had this week, they managed to continue pressing forward. As they neared their destination, Lavi felt the tension between them rising.

He wasn’t sure how much longer he could take it.

The door to the shack opened, creaking on rusted hinges as Allen entered. His shoulders slumped with fatigue, and Lavi could already hear his stomach protesting loudly when he smelled the soup.

Lavi smiled weakly, watching Allen drop his pack on the dirty floor. “Hungry?”

“Starving,” Allen admitted, crossing the small, one-room shack and standing next to Lavi at the hearth. “I can’t believe you managed to make something with the last of our rations.”

“Don’t get too excited. It’s just vegetable soup.” Lavi ladled out a large helping into a bowl and handed it to Allen, steam wafting off the liquid. “Here. Better eat up.”

“Thanks.” Allen took it and didn’t bother with a spoon, drinking straight from the bowl. Before Lavi could even serve himself a helping, Allen pulled the bowl from his lips and let out a satisfied sigh. “Ahh, that hit the spot.”

Lavi chuckled, stirring the pot once more and serving him a second bowlful. “That appetite of yours never ceases to amaze me, Al.”

Allen took the refilled bowl, cupping his hands around it. “It’s a pain, especially since we’re low on funds.” He took a sip of the soup, but didn’t drain the bowl this time. “We managed to clean out some pockets in town, though. It should be enough to get us food and, if we’re lucky, transportation. We’ll need the funds to get to England.”

Lavi nodded as he poured himself a bowl. Allen had received a letter from General Cross, telling him there was a way to remove the Noah memories from a host. A woman in Liverpool held the answers, and after Tyki and Lavi had run off with Allen, their entire journey revolved around finding this person. But it seemed that bad luck followed them around like the plague, and traveling to their destination was easier said than done.

“Good. I’m tired of walking everywhere—I’m gonna wear holes in my boots.” He sat down on the floor next to the fire. The old shack had been abandoned for years, considering the condition, and there was no furniture in the dilapidated building. But, as they were short on cash and didn’t have an option, it had to do for the night.

“We’ll load up on supplies in the morning when we pass through town.” Allen settled in as well, using his bedroll to cushion his legs. He cleared his throat before taking another gulp of soup. “Tyki should be back in an hour. He wanted to keep playing cards for a while. He thought he could get more money.”

“Oh… Okay.” Lavi had thought it odd that they hadn’t returned together, but didn’t want to ask.

Silence ate its way between them, and all Lavi could hear was the soft crackling of the fire next to him. He ate slowly, avoiding Allen’s eyes as he sipped at the bland broth and chewed the occasional carrot or potato that brought a hint of substance to the soup.

It had been a week since the incident at the inn, and Lavi still had trouble being alone with Allen or Tyki for more than a few minutes at a time. At least when they were all together, he could pretend that the uneasy feeling was simply the animosity between Tyki and Allen flaring up again. But when he was alone with either of them, Lavi couldn’t ignore that he was the reason for their strife. The guilt burned in his guts like hot acid, eating away at his insides. Lavi couldn’t decide who was worse to spend time alone with. When he was with Allen, all he could think about was how much he’d hurt him by being with Tyki. And when he was with Tyki, he was reminded that Tyki thought he loved Allen—not him. He still hadn’t admitted how deeply his feelings for the Noah went, though neither had Tyki. All he had to hang onto were a few comments he was certain he’d read too much into.

The silence stretched on, well past what was considered comfortable, and when Lavi finished with his bowl, he hurried to clean it just to give him something to do other than sit with Allen and not talk. Things had been easier before all this. They had been comfortable together, friendly. Now this haze of unease settled in around him, and Lavi felt like he was sitting with a stranger—that he was the stranger.

“If you want more, go ahead. Just save some for, uh…” Lavi fumbled, Tyki’s name on the tip of his tongue. He tried to say it, but froze up, as if just the mere mention of him would cause the air around them to combust into flames.

Allen sighed, setting his empty bowl down. He watched Lavi, concern on his face. “You can say his name, Lavi.”

“I’m sorry,” Lavi said, shaking his head. Why did this have to be so hard? “I just don’t want to upset you, and—”

“Lavi, stop.” Allen pulled his arm and forced Lavi to sit down on the dirty floor next to him, their thin bedrolls stretched out and barely keeping the cracked floorboards from poking them uncomfortably. “This has to stop. We can’t keep avoiding the subject like this.”

Looking back at Allen was terrifying and comforting all at once, and it left Lavi unsure of how to proceed. He didn’t want to talk, but the look on Allen’s face was so comfortingly familiar that it was hard to pull away. And when he thought about it logically, they did need to talk, to clear the air.

After the three of them had run off together, Lavi had only divulged a few things to Allen. He had told him how he and Bookman had been captured by the Noah, and that Bookman had made a deal with them to save their asses. In exchange for information on the 14th, Bookman and Lavi were free to do as they pleased. After that, he had been stuck at the Noah’s mansion, recording what they could from the Noah’s side.

Lavi had made vague comments about how rough it had been, but other than that, he had never fully explained himself. There had never been time—not for just the two of them to converse without Tyki around, and even thinking back on those painfully dark days left Lavi feeling that same helpless chill in his bones. He avoided Allen’s gaze until a warm hand pressed against his shoulder. Allen’s touch was so soft and gentle that Lavi shivered against it.

“Lavi,” Allen said, repeating his name in that sweet tone that made the redhead’s legs turn to jelly. “Help me to understand why things are… how they are now.”

He owed Allen that much, didn’t he? Lavi rubbed at his face, hands trembling as he thought back on how it all began. “I don’t know, Al… Sometimes I wonder that myself.” He let out a weak chuckle before turning back to Allen. He was watching Lavi, patiently waiting for him to continue. “I… It was rough, being in that mansion with all of them. Bookman said we couldn’t leave, not when we needed to record. But seeing the Noah every day—remembering how they tortured me to get the information from Gramps…” Lavi shook his head, as if to banish the memories to the back of his mind.

Allen’s hand tightened on his shoulder, but he said nothing, letting Lavi regain his composure in silence.

“I didn’t take it well… And I caused a lot of trouble for myself. I mouthed off too much. But, Tyki never hurt me physically like the others did. He preferred to taunt me with words instead. I thought he was no better than the rest, but…” Lavi rubbed at his chest while recalling the memories. “He was nice to me when I got myself in trouble a few times. Sheryl had broken my ribs one night, left me in the hallway to bleed out. But Tyki took care of me since Bookman was gone at the time. He kept saying it was because he was bored—that I was the only interesting thing in the mansion, and if I got myself killed, he’d have nothing better to do.”

Lavi paused to rub at his arm, swallowing hard against his dry throat. “It was like that for a while. Tyki just kept taunting me, but helping me. I tried not to think about it, but when Bookman came back, he told me… told me that you had succumbed to the 14th. T-That you were gone.”

Allen’s eyes widened, his breath catching in his throat. He bit down on his lower lip, watching Lavi quietly as he waited for him to continue.

“I didn’t know what to do, Al. I was so lost. I… I couldn’t deal with the thought of you being gone. And that was when… when…” Lavi shook his head, forcing himself to spit out the words. “I slept with Tyki that night. I told myself it was just to forget about everything, even for just a little while. Just that one time. And it helped. I could actually forget about how everything fucking sucked for just a few minutes. But afterwards, I just felt worse.”

It was like a dam had burst—Lavi felt the words tumbling from his mouth, too many words and thoughts and feelings all coming out too fast for him to even process. He’d held it all in for so long, and now that he could say it, could admit it, he couldn’t stop talking.

“It was only supposed to be one time, Allen. But Tyki came back. I wanted to deny him, and God knows I tried, but it was so hard being stuck there with no one. And he made me forget everything that hurt. It wasn’t supposed to get this far, but it became a constant thing. We would meet almost every day, and I…” He had to pause—the memories and feelings washing over him all at once left him more emotional than he’d thought he’d be. Tears prickled in his good eye. “I didn’t mean for it to happen…”

Allen paused before he asked, “…Didn’t mean for what to happen?”

Lavi sucked in a shuddered breath. “I love him.” The words felt like hot fire on his tongue, burning and bright. They were words he’d never uttered in front of another soul, words he had tried to ignore, words that he wished he could forget. “I know it’s fucked up and I know that he’s… he’s not good for me. He’s possessive and rude and too rough with me sometimes. But he can be soft and thoughtful, too. And even though he won’t admit it, I think… I think he loves me, too.”

He turned to meet Allen’s gaze, his green eye rimmed red as he held back tears. “But I still love you, too, Al. I love you so much. I’ve missed you…” He dug his fingers into his dusty pants to steady himself and shook his head as he continued. “I know we were never really together, that we never had a chance to—”

“Lavi,” Allen interrupted, placing a hand on his cheek to steer his vision back to him. “Lavi, it’s okay. I understand. You don’t have to explain your reasoning. If you want to be with Tyki, then that’s your choice.”

Lavi was struck by the love in Allen’s face. He had that smile on, the soft one tinted with just a hint of sadness, and it left Lavi’s stomach clenched tight in regret. “But Al—”

“I love you, too. You know I do,” Allen said, pressing both hands to Lavi’s cheeks now. “You’ve always been important to me. Just because we’re not together doesn’t mean that will ever change. I just want you to be happy. So, please—be happy. Stop beating yourself up over this.”

“Al…” Lavi felt his throat tighten and his hands tremble. He pressed them over Allen’s as he held his face. It was too much, just too much to bear.

“Lavi, may I ask you for one thing?”

He nodded. “Anything.”

“One last kiss?”

Tears finally slipped down the side of Lavi’s cheek as he leaned in and captured Allen’s lips with his own, not hesitating. It was so different than kissing Tyki. Allen’s mouth tasted faintly of the soup they’d just eaten, wet and warm and soft. He whined into the kiss, reaching out to grab hold of Allen’s sides, as if he’d disappear once Lavi let go.

Allen’s thumbs wiped away the dampness on his skin, gently caressing his cheeks. It was just how Lavi had recalled their other kisses, hurried and stolen in between missions when no one was paying attention to them. They’d never gotten far in their relationship, and Lavi had never been able to confess like he had wanted. But it didn’t matter now—Lavi was with Tyki, and for reasons he still couldn’t understand, he loved him.

When Lavi pulled away, he watched Allen press his lips together as he gently let go of his face. He could see the myriad of emotions flickering over Allen’s face, but couldn’t speak to them. His heart was in his throat and the tears threatened to spill over his cheeks again.

“Let’s get some rest,” Allen finally said, pulling completely away. Lavi’s skin felt twice as cold when Allen retreated. “We’ve got a long day tomorrow.”

“R-Right,” Lavi mumbled in response, grabbing their bowls and cleaning them before packing them away. Tyki still wasn’t back yet, and he was still keyed up after his conversation with Allen. But once he relaxed against his bedroll, his back to the low burning fire, he felt the tension ooze from his body. Before he could think on what had happened between them any longer, he fell asleep to the sounds of the crackling fire and Allen’s soft breathing on the other side of the room.

 

xXxXxXx

 

Lavi smelled cheap ale and stale cigarette smoke before he could even open his eye. He groaned as he felt pressure behind him, and an arm around his midsection. A bite of cold air sucked under the blanket for a moment, only to be replaced by the warmth of another body against his. He tried to turn, but was met with resistance, and lips on his neck. When he reached behind him, he found a mass of dark, curly hair, and tangled his fingers into it. “Tyki?” he mumbled out, still drowsy as he pulled himself out of sleep.

“Mm, Red,” Tyki mumbled, nuzzling his neck and fumbling as he slid his hand over Lavi’s stomach. “You went to sleep without me.”

“Sorry,” Lavi whispered hoarsely, “You were late and I was tired.” He managed to extract himself from Tyki’s grip long enough to turn around to face him. He smoothed a hand over Tyki’s cheek, finding his skin rough from the stubble of not shaving for a few days. When his eye finally focused in the dim light of the shack, he saw Tyki’s face close to his own, cheeks flushed and hot under his touch.

“Allen said you stayed to keep hustling.” Lavi sat up slowly, regretting it as the cold air chilled him. “Did you win more money?”

“Enough to buy us passage to England,” Tyki said, leaning in closer. Lavi smelled the alcohol on his breath. “We’ll make it to Liverpool in two weeks, if we’re lucky.” He began kissing over Lavi’s neck again, his hand snaking down to grope the front of his pants.

Lavi sucked in a quick breath, hips twitching up into the touch. “Tyki, don’t. Allen’s in the room, you know.”

“Wouldn’t be the first time,” he whispered against his neck, chuckling as he tugged at Lavi’s pants to undo the buttons.

“You’re drunk, aren’t you?” Lavi asked. He’d never seen Tyki drunk before, and while it was amusing to see the Noah in such disarray, it unnerved him more than anything. Tyki had barely interacted with him in the past week, and now he was all over him like a burr. “Aren’t you hungry? We saved you some soup.”

“I’d rather eat you.” Tyki tugged up Lavi’s shirt and licked along his stomach. Lavi flinched at the touch, too ticklish to hold still. “C’mon, _Laaavi_. Let me suck you off, at least. I want your cock in my mouth right now.”

Lavi glanced over at their companion on the bedroll just a few feet away. Allen seemed to be asleep still, but if he let Tyki continue, that wouldn’t be the case for long. This time, they didn’t have the luxury of having Allen on medicine to keep him knocked out.

And Tyki didn’t look like he would take no for an answer.

“Okay,” Lavi whispered, sitting up and pushing Tyki off. He was still hovering too close, the smell of ale and cigarettes transferring to Lavi’s own clothing. Tyki stumbled with him as Lavi attempted to quietly make his way outside.

They were far enough from the main road to avoid being seen, but as Lavi stepped out of the rickety old shack, he shivered against the chill in the night air. He pulled Tyki with him into the sparse trees that surrounded them. Before they could get far, Tyki grabbed onto Lavi and pushed him against one of the thick maples, kissing him sloppily as he tugged at the remaining clasps on his pants.

Lavi tightened his grasp on Tyki’s shirt, pulling him closer. Something felt off, like a nagging thought in the back of his mind that wouldn’t quite take form. “Tyki?” he asked as he pulled away from the kiss. “Are you all right?”

Tyki chuckled, fumbling to undo Lavi’s pants. He was so drunk that Lavi had to hold him upright. “Never better, Red. Never better.” He slid his hand into Lavi’s pants once they were loose around his hips, fondling him clumsily.

Lavi gasped at the touch, but managed to keep his head on straight for the moment. “It’s just… you don’t usually drink when you gamble.” Lavi leaned back against the tree, his hands on Tyki’s shoulders as he watched him warily. He groaned softly as Tyki’s fingers found purchase, wrapping around his half-hard length.

“Just felt like it, is all,” Tyki said, pressing open-mouthed kisses onto Lavi’s neck. There were still bruises from the last time they’d fucked, fading yellow against his freckled skin. Tyki charmed them back to life, sucking vivid black and purple hickies onto his neck and shoulders.

Lavi could sense the lies in Tyki’s words, but bit his tongue to keep from calling him out on it. He seemed like he was in a good mood, but something brewed just under the surface that left Lavi unnerved in spite of Tyki’s amorous touches. “A-Are you sure?” he asked, his breath catching when Tyki nipped at his skin a little too roughly. “Aren’t you… I thought you were still mad at me?”

They hadn’t spoken about the incident at the inn, and even though Tyki hadn’t pulled away as deliberately as Allen had, their relationship had been strained over the week, more so than before. Most surprising of all was Tyki’s lack of interest in swapping skin.

Tyki hummed, the sound reverberating in his throat as he continued to kiss over Lavi’s shoulder, still tipsy. “What’s the point of being mad? I can’t make you love me instead of him.”

Lavi froze up, hands tightening in Tyki’s shirt. It was so out of place to hear Tyki speak like that, and he knew it had to be the alcohol’s influence leaving his lips looser than normal. He spoke of it so flippantly that it left Lavi’s chest heavy with guilt—as if it were impossible for him to love Tyki.

It reminded him of his talk with Allen not a few hours earlier, of their shared kiss, and he felt twice as guilty.

“Do…Do you want me to love you?” Lavi asked, pressing his face into the crook of Tyki’s neck. His heart hammered in his chest, rattling his ribcage and making it hard to breathe.

Tyki snickered, though the sound was devoid of mirth. He pulled away from Lavi’s neck and grabbed his chin, forcing them to meet their gazes. He ran his thumb along Lavi’s lips before leaning in and kissing him with a needy groan. He didn’t answer the question, and Lavi knew bringing it up again was fruitless.

Lavi moaned into the kiss, his hips jerking up into Tyki’s hand as he continued to palm him. As guilty as he felt, he couldn’t push Tyki away or stop the desperate noises from crawling up his throat. He let Tyki touch him, do whatever he wanted with his body. He didn’t care, as long as it eased the sick feeling in his guts and made Tyki happy.

Tyki let go of him for a short moment, just long enough to undo his own pants. When he was free, he grabbed his own cock with Lavi’s in his palm and worked them together with unsteady strokes. “Mmm… You want more, Red?”

Sucking in a breath, Lavi nodded and bit his lower lip. “Y-Yes. Whatever you want. Just do it.”

Grinning, Tyki kissed over his jaw before letting go of their arousals and sliding down to his knees. Lavi watched him, cheeks flushed as Tyki grabbed his hips and slipped his erection into his mouth. He let out a strangled moan, knees weak as he grabbed the tree at his back and tried to keep on his feet. Tyki’s mouth was hot and wet, and fucking perfect.

Lavi’s nails dug into the bark as he struggled to keep upright. The rough wood bit into his back and he fought to keep his hips still as Tyki sucked him off. He watched Tyki with a half-lidded eye as he worked back and forth on his length, hollowing out his cheeks. Tyki’s tongue slid over him, strong and wet, leaving a curl of want in Lavi’s guts that only grew more intense with each stroke.

“T-Tyki…” he whined, head knocking back against the tree trunk. “Please…Feels s-so good…”

Tyki hummed in reply, his mouth too busy to speak, and tightened his grip on Lavi’s hips, nails digging into soft flesh. Lavi winced, but the sharp feeling disappeared with a few more strokes of Tyki’s tongue.

He needed more. God, he needed more.

His fingers smoothed into Tyki’s hair, tugging him back with a gentle insistence. Lavi sucked in a few breaths, his thighs shaking as he fought to get the words out. “F-Fuck me, Tyki. I want y-you inside me.” He was on the cusp of an orgasm, but didn’t want to cum—not yet, not when he could have that full feeling of Tyki’s dick jammed so far up his ass he could taste it.

Chuckling, Tyki slipped off Lavi’s cock, his lips smoothing over every ridge and curve as he watched the redhead from below. “You want it that bad, Red?” he asked, wiping at his wet lips with the back of his hand.

Lavi didn’t bother to hide his aching arousal or flushed cheeks. “Yes. Yes, please,” he begged, his fingers tightening in Tyki’s hair.

Tyki stood on unsteady legs, leaning into Lavi and kissing him firmly. Lavi tasted the hint of his own essence on Tyki’s lips, along with the heavy burn of alcohol. When Tyki pulled away, he grinned at Lavi. “Turn around.”

Lavi did as asked, hands tight on the tree trunk as Tyki pulled his pants down further until they settled around his ankles. Before he could say anything, Tyki spread his legs and leaned up behind him. His lips curved into a smile against Lavi’s neck. “You want it rough, Red?” Two fingers slipped into Lavi’s mouth, and he moaned against them as Tyki’s cock strained against his ass. “Maybe I’ll rip you in two.”

Lavi almost choked on the fingers in his mouth, Tyki working them deeper than normal. When he pulled them free, saliva clung to the digits, and he started fingering Lavi’s ass. He whined, already feeling the stretch to be painful without proper lubrication. “M-Maybe I want you to…”

Tyki pressed his fingers into Lavi, and the redhead gasped out in pain. It was too much, too fast, but Tyki didn’t slow down. “Like the first time we fucked? You took me in so well, like your ass was made for me.” He curled his fingers inside of Lavi, pressing harder. “You screamed so nice—I wanted to fuck you until you lost your voice.”

Tyki hit that sweet spot inside him, and Lavi moaned against the feeling. He collapsed against the tree, barely keeping on his feet as Tyki abused that sensitive area over and over again. Pain melted into pleasure so quickly that it left Lavi’s head spinning. He bit his lip hard to keep his voice from echoing in the forest.

“Maybe I’ll do it tonight,” Tyki said, pulling his fingers free and lining himself up against his entrance. “Maybe I’ll make you lose that pretty voice of yours.” Without another word, he plunged into Lavi.

Tears prickled at Lavi’s eye and his nails dug into the bark as he bit back a cry. Tyki grabbed his hips, forcing him back and flush against him. Lavi bent over, still clinging to the tree as Tyki began his steady, rough pace. Each thrust rubbed against Lavi’s prostate, leaving him weak-kneed and groaning at the touch.

Every noise he made only encouraged Tyki to keep at it, thrusting harder and harder to force another pitiful moan from Lavi’s lips. His own aching arousal still burned between his legs, stiff and throbbing in the cool night air. Lavi couldn’t grab himself, though. He needed to brace against the tree or risk toppling over. It would’ve been easier to fuck on the ground like animals.

The wet slap of skin on skin was like a drum beat, and Lavi fell into the rhythm. It was as rough as he remembered, and when Tyki spoke so unashamed about their first time, Lavi couldn’t help but feel that chill of desire crawling up his spine. _Forget, forget_ —it was the reason he’d let Tyki fuck him in the first place. He had wanted to forget how shitty his life had become, how pointless and painful each day was. This was no difference now, even if his reasonings weren’t the same. He could let Tyki fuck him until he bled for days, score his flesh with nails and teeth, and at least in that moment, Lavi would know that he was alive and he had control over something.

And Tyki wanted him. _Him_. He was a broken mess, a failure. He couldn’t be a Bookman or an Exorcist. His life was meaningless without direction. The only reason he was still alive was because of Tyki and Allen—they kept him going. If he could help them, he could at least be useful, even if he was nothing more than a plaything.

“ _Ahh—_ Fuck!” Lavi gasped out, a particularly rough thrust rocking his body until his knees nearly gave out. He scrambled to regain his grip on the tree, nearly numb from the waist down as Tyki kept pounding into him. It hurt so much that the pain turned to pleasure, and Lavi didn’t want it to stop.

Tyki gripped Lavi’s hips, bruising them with strong fingers as he kept working into him. “Just like before, Red. You’re so fucking gorgeous.”

Lavi heaved in a breath, his throat dry and sore from panting and moaning at every thrust. “K-Keep going, God. Don’t s-stop.” His nails dug gouges into the tree bark, and he pressed his forehead against the wood.

“God can’t hear you now,” Tyki rasped, punctuating his words with a hard pump of his hips that stole what little air was left in Lavi’s lungs. “But everyone else can.”

Lavi groaned, his erection strained and leaking against his stomach. Tyki was hitting him in that perfect spot once more, and at the rough pace he’d set, all Lavi could do was tremble and moan as Tyki fucked him harder and harder. He whispered half words and gibberish, shaking his head back and forth. Even their first time wasn’t like this—wasn’t this aggressive and crude.

But he deserved to be used like a cheap toy, didn’t he?

With a gasp, Lavi stiffened up and arched his back. He was so full and raw, and Tyki didn’t show signs of stopping. Even without touching himself, he felt ready to burst. “T-Tyki… I can’t—I’m gonna—”

“Do it, Red. Cum for me,” Tyki interrupted, leaning in and biting down on his shoulder.

Lavi let out a choked moan, spilling untouched against the tree he clung to. Tyki kept fucking him, working his hips at a painful pace until he came as well. When he’d finished, he collapsed against Lavi’s back, one hand on the tree to help brace his weight and the other curled tightly around Lavi’s waist. They stood like that for a minute, fighting to catch their breath as their bodies cooled.

Tyki pulled out of Lavi with a sigh, and Lavi winced at the empty feeling. He was raw, sore, and cum dripped from his backside and spilled down his still-shaking legs. Shame washed over him like a wave and his stomach clenched tight. Tyki turned him around, pushing him back against the tree and kissing him—softer this time, and so opposite of how he’d been just moments ago.

“You’re all dirty, Red,” Tyki mumbled, kissing his neck before sliding a hand between Lavi’s legs. He toyed with the cooling cum smeared over his skin. Lavi shivered.

“I know,” was all he could reply with, avoiding Tyki’s yellow eyes. They were too intense.

“C’mon, then. Let’s clean you up and go to sleep.” Tyki took a step back, tugging Lavi’s loose pants back up around his waist before leading him back to the shack.

Lavi followed on numb legs, limping as he tried to keep up. He hoped he could fall asleep without worrisome thoughts cluttering his head for once, but his mind was anything but silent.

 

xXxXxXx

 

“Are you all right? You’re limping…”

Lavi snapped his head up at the question, trying to hide the surprise in his eye as Allen regarded him cautiously. “I’m fine. Just, uh, a cramp.”

They had to walk to town that morning, too early for Lavi’s liking, and by the time they made it to the general store to buy supplies, he was rethinking last night’s activities. His ass ached worse than he’d ever remembered, and every step sent a shooting pain through his abdomen. Not wanting to let Allen know what he’d done, or let on to Tyki how much he hurt, he suffered through it and pretended everything was fine.

He grabbed a few loaves of bread from the shelf and handed them to Allen. “Let’s just hurry up. The sooner we get supplies, the sooner we can leave. We need to get moving if we wanna catch the boat.” He picked food off the shelves so quickly that he barely looked at what he was snatching up.

Allen frowned, concern written all over his face, but he said nothing to it. “We’ll make it in time.” He scanned the shelves, grabbing a few items as well, but with less ruthless efficiency than Lavi had. Lavi could still feel Allen’s worried eyes burning a hole in the back of his head as he collected things they might need, but he ignored it. He didn’t want pity or the attention.

They hurried to the counter with their purchases, and Allen paid with the money he’d swindled a few unsuspecting drunks out of the night before. They stuffed their bags full of supplies and headed back out onto the street. The sun beat down on them as they exited, the early morning already warm and promising an even hotter day. Lavi swallowed down a sigh, shouldering his pack and heading across the sidewalk.

Tyki stood at the corner, lit cigarette between his lips as he stared off down the road. There were a couple hours until noon, but the streets already bustled with activity. Tyki didn’t notice them until they were a few feet away. He pulled the cigarette from his lips and let out a smoky breath. “Ready?”

Allen nodded, adjusting the straps on his shoulders. “Did you find us a ride?”

He shook his head. “I must have one of those faces. Everyone avoided me.”

With a sigh, Allen started walking, not waiting for either of them. “Try to be a little more cordial and less murderous when asking for a ride. It might help.”

“You know, I could just kill someone and take their horses. Honestly, it would be so much easier.”

“I wish you were joking,” Allen mumbled, lips set in a thin line.

Tyki settled into stride next to Lavi, Allen just a few paces ahead of them as they walked. “I am joking, boy. C’mon, I know the rules already. No killing any fleshbag humans.”

“Not exactly the tone or word choice I was hoping for.” Allen didn’t even glance over his stiff shoulder as he snapped back his retorts.

They continued on like that, bickering back and forth as Lavi kept his pace. Every step was agony, but he didn’t make a sound as they slipped past the outskirts of town and down the winding road. They would be walking all day, and in that moment, he wasn’t sure how long he’d last before they caught on to his condition, or he collapsed.

He made it an hour before Tyki noticed his fumbling footsteps.

“You don’t look so good.”

Lavi swallowed thickly, his tongue feeling too big for his mouth in late morning heat. Sweat prickled over his skin, sticking to clothes and hanging in his hair. He shook his head and tried to straighten his stance, even as his backside ached. “I’m fine.”

Allen turned, regarding them both quietly. His lips quirked downward, a frown marring his face. “Lavi, if you’re not feeling well, we should stop.”

“I’m fine—let’s just keep going. We don’t have time to stop.” Lavi tried to keep walking, but Tyki grabbed his arm and held him in place. He tugged it, but his grip stayed firm.

“You’ve been acting weird all morning. What’s going on with you?” Tyki narrowed his eyes, jaw set tight.

“Tyki, let go.” Lavi glared back at him, but the attempt was a pointless endeavor. Tyki wasn’t intimidated in the least, and didn’t budge.

“Not until you explain what the hell’s wrong with you.”

Lavi pursed his lips and looked away. He wasn’t going to admit how it was hard to walk with his ass ravaged from last night’s activities—especially not in front of Allen.

When the silence went on too long, Tyki sighed and pushed Lavi to the edge of the road with a sour look on his face. “If you’re so worried about wasting time, then you’d better explain yourself quick. We’re not leaving until you do.”

“Seriously, just forget abo—” Before Lavi could spit out his entire sentence, he tripped on an uneven patch of dirt and fell over. He landed on his ass and hissed in pain as he was jarred too roughly. Clenching his teeth tight to hold in another pain-ridden noise, Lavi curled up on his side, holding his stomach and squeezing his eye shut tight.

“Lavi!” Allen exclaimed, dropping his bag and rushing to the redhead’s side. Lavi felt his hands on him, warm and comforting as he tried to help him up in a sitting position. But every time he even got close to putting pressure on his ass, he winced and hissed again.

“Okay—you can’t say you’re not in pain now,” Allen added, brows furrowed as he looked him over. “What happened? Is it your stomach?”

He must’ve noticed Lavi holding his midsection, and God, Lavi wished that was the case. “No,” he replied, breaking out in a nervous sweat. “It’s… I…” Fuck, he couldn’t say it out loud. He averted his gaze, staring at the ground instead of Allen’s concerned face.

There was an awkward moment, silence between them except for the comforting twittering of birds above in the trees. Before Allen could pressure Lavi for an answer, Tyki pushed him out of the way, leaving Allen to snap a few obscenities in his direction. Tyki ignored it, grabbing Lavi’s arm and pulling him back up to his feet.

“You’re an idiot. You should’ve said something.” He didn’t elaborate, and tossed his own pack and Lavi’s to Allen. “Carry these.” Tyki twisted around and pulled Lavi up onto his back. Lavi didn’t even have a chance to protest before he was being carried piggyback, arms around Tyki’s neck and legs dangling on either side of him.

“Put me down, Tyki.” Lavi felt a flush spread over his skin, and he buried his face into Tyki’s shoulder to hide it.

“Aren’t you the one bitching about us being on such a tight schedule? Shut up and let me carry you. It’s faster this way.” Tyki tightened his grip on Lavi’s legs and started back down the road, Allen following up behind with their bags.

“This is embarrassing,” Lavi muttered, suddenly very happy that they were on a deserted stretch of road. He didn’t want anyone to see this—it was bad enough Allen witnessed it.

“But efficient.”

“I’m too heavy.”

“Lucky for you, I’m beautiful and strong.”

Lavi made a strangled noise in the back of throat, unable to reply properly.

Allen caught up to them both, awkwardly juggling the three packs. “Lavi, what’s going on?”

He turned to the side, finally opening his eye and looking down at Allen. He wanted to explain, if nothing else to keep his friend from worrying, but the words caught in his throat.

But Tyki’s lips were looser.

“I fucked him too hard last night,” he said without a hint of shame. He grinned over at Allen, amused by the way his silver eyes widened and his steps faltered. “Wanna hear more about it?”

“No, thank you,” Allen replied in a curt tone, turning his gaze forward and quickening his pace. Once he was far enough ahead that he couldn’t hear their conversation, Lavi sighed and tightened his grip on Tyki’s neck.

“Why did you have to tell him?” He knew he sounded exhausted and defeated, but he couldn’t help it.

Tyki shrugged as best he could while carrying Lavi. “He wouldn’t stop asking until you told him, and I knew you were too chicken shit to admit the truth.”

“How noble.”

“Well? Would you rather have him hound you about it until you either had to lie or admit why your ass is sore?”

“No, but—”

“Then, you’re welcome,” Tyki said, cutting him off.

Lavi sighed and relaxed his head against Tyki’s shoulder, nose buried in the back of his neck as curly strands of black hair tickled his skin. As much as he hated to admit it, Tyki was right. Allen was too worried to let it go, and the truth was easier than a lie.

It was silent for a while, and Lavi tried to focus on the steady thump of Tyki’s feet against the dirt road as he walked. He was so distracted by it that when Tyki finally spoke up again, he was surprised by the low rumble of his voice.

“You’re okay, right?”

Lavi blinked, lifting his head up. He couldn’t see Tyki’s face from the angle he was at, but he felt the stiffness in his shoulders, and the concern in his voice was unmistakable. “Yeah…” he replied softly before clearing his throat. “I’m okay. Just really sore. Walking isn’t helping.”

“I gathered that, considering you looked like death warmed over.”

Lavi felt Tyki’s thumbs slide over his legs, a gentle caress that left him smiling. “Thanks for telling me I look like shit.”

“Hey, I’m an honest guy.”

“Except when playing cards.”

“That’s different.”

“Sure it is.”

“Are you sure you want to get smart with the guy who’s carrying your ass?”

Lavi snickered, and it felt good to laugh, even that little bit. Their banter was a welcome relief from the painful unease that had hung between them for too long now. “Well, the only reason you’re carrying my ass is because you wrecked it last night.”

Tyki was quiet for a moment, hands tightening on Lavi’s thighs as he continued to walk. “…You’re sure you’re okay?”

The concern in his voice was palpable, and Lavi pressed his nose against Tyki’s shoulder. “I’m sure.” Even as embarrassed as he was, he placed a small kiss in the crook of Tyki’s neck. “Don’t worry. You only did what I asked you to.”

Tyki let out a short, clipped laugh, but it rang hollow in Lavi’s ears. “Worry? I’m not worried, Red. Why would I be worried about you?”

Lavi closed his eye, smiling softly to himself. “My mistake.”

 

xXxXxXx

 

They had found a town to stop at before nightfall, and instead of pressing through, Tyki insisted they rest for the night. He was exhausted from carrying Lavi most of the way, and the redhead didn’t look much better. He still had that sickly pallor to his skin, the corner of his eye pinched like he was in pain but wouldn’t admit it. Besides, traveling at night and half-cocked was the perfect excuse for Akuma or Noah to ambush them. They couldn’t risk it.

After grabbing dinner at the tavern, they retired to the inn to rest up for tomorrow’s travel. Lavi crawled into bed as soon as he could, too tired and sore to do anything but pass out. With his head too jumbled to sleep, Tyki stood outside, smoking by himself as he loitered by the entrance. The cool summer air helped calm his thoughts and clear his head.

When he heard the front door to the inn open and close again, he paid it no mind. People had been filtering in and out for a while now. But movement next to him caught his eye. Allen stood at his side, a sour look on his face, and arms crossed over his chest. He stared at Tyki, stance aggressive as he narrowed his eyes.

“And what do I owe the pleasure of this visit, boy?” Tyki asked, turning his eyes back to the street and taking another drag from his cigarette. He already knew, or at least had an inkling, about what Allen wanted to say. But he liked playing dumb, if nothing else, to piss him off.

Allen stood there for a good minute, glaring with seething contempt. Just as Tyki was about to tell him to say something or leave, Allen pushed him hard against the wall, Innocence activated on his left hand. Tyki’s head knocked against the wood as Allen pinned him there, claw tight over his chest. Tyki tried to move or phase through the hold, but Crown Clown was like iron shackles. He couldn’t budge, and that itchy, uncomfortable feeling of being too close to Innocence made his blood burn—a deep need to destroy it bubbling to the surface.

Tyki grit his teeth, cigarette still pinched between them as he grinned down at Allen. “You seem upset.”

Allen’s eyes narrowed and he ignored the comment. “Listen, and listen closely, because I’m only going to say this once.” He leaned in closer, looking up at Tyki. “I don’t know what kind of game you’re playing with Lavi, but it ends now.”

A choked laugh rumbled in Tyki’s throat. He strained against Allen’s hold to glower down at him. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Allen tightened his grip, and Tyki winced, the cigarette falling from his lips. “I don’t know why you’re stringing him along, but I’m not letting it happen anymore. Leave him alone or you answer to me.”

“As if that’s a threat,” Tyki scoffed. “Besides, Red wants me. Good luck with that.” Even though he said the words with ease and confidence, doubt clouded his thoughts. But his poker face held up, even under Allen’s scrutiny.

“You’ve been toying with him for months now. Lavi told me what happened.” Tyki held his smug glare, ignoring Allen’s words. “If you don’t actually care for him, you need to stop this.”

“It’s none of your business.”

“It’s my business when you hurt my friend, Tyki. And I’d say after today’s shitshow, it’s obvious you’re hurting him.”

Tyki stiffened at the accusation, and he felt that annoying pang of guilt deep in his chest. He swallowed it down. “That was an accident.”

“I think you hurt him on purpose.”

“You’re just jealous that he’s fucking me and not you.” Tyki spat the words out so fast, like a reflex. Allen didn’t flinch, as if he’d been expecting the taunt, and it threw him off that he didn’t get the response he’d wanted. “C’mon—you can’t tell me it doesn’t eat you up inside that he’s mine and not yours.”

“I don’t care who he’s with.” Allen’s face was set hard, his silver eyes never leaving Tyki’s as he spoke. “All I care about is that he’s happy and healthy—and I know he can be neither of those things with you right now.”

Tyki couldn’t keep eye contact anymore, twisting his head to the side and clenching his jaw tight. “Aren’t you just a fucking saint.”

Allen watched him for another long moment before finally letting go and deactivating his Innocence. The burning itch receded, but Tyki didn’t move away from the wall. He still felt Allen’s eyes on him, watching and waiting.

“You know he cares about you, right?” Allen said suddenly, the hard edge in his voice cracking just enough for Tyki to notice.

Tyki chuckled, digging his blunt nails into the palms of his hands. “Does he?”

Allen turned away and walked back inside the inn. “You’d be surprised.”

Keeping his back firm against the wall, Tyki waited until Allen was out of sight. When he was blissfully alone once more, he let out a sigh and patted down his pockets, looking for his pack of smokes. He pulled another cigarette out and lit it quickly, taking a long drag and letting the smoke fill his lungs.

He would never get to sleep at this rate.

 

xXxXxXx

 

Lavi groaned, feeling the mattress dip down next to his hip as someone sat in the bed with him. He rolled to his back, still sore and bleary-eyed. He’d only slept for a few hours, and it had to be close to midnight by now. “Tyki?” he mumbled, rubbing at his eye.

He felt the weight shift again, now on his hips, but it was wrong—too light to be Tyki. When Lavi finally opened his eye and looked up, he blinked. “…Al?”

“Guess again.”

Yellow eyes stared down at him, and Lavi stiffened up at the realization that this was not his friend pinning him to the bed—

It was the 14th.

Lavi jerked upwards, hoping to toss Alle—the 14th, off of him. He struggled, legs caught in the blankets and his head still fuzzy from sleep. But the tumbling ended as the 14th pressed the point of a blade at Lavi’s throat. The tip dug in, sharp and tight.

“Ah, ah, ah,” the 14th tsked, adjusting his position. He sat on Lavi’s hips, one hand on his chest while the other pressed the knife point right against his neck. “Stay still or my hand might slip.” The smile that curled up on his lips made Lavi’s stomach churn. It was a look that should never have been on his friend’s face. He wanted to puke.

He averted his gaze for just a second, but the 14th pressed the blade firmly against his neck. Lavi looked back, gaze captured by those yellow eyes.

God, they looked just like Tyki’s…

“He’s not here, Bookman Junior,” the 14th said, raising his eyebrows as he leaned in closer. “It’s just you and me.”

Lavi’s chest heaved up and down, panic ringing in his ears. He wanted to run, toss the Noah off him and make a break for the door, but one wrong move and the 14th would slit his throat without a second thought. He just had to wait—wait for an opportunity. Keep him talking— _stall_.

“What do you want?” Lavi asked, forcing himself to even out his breathing and set his jaw tight.

“Right to the point.” The 14th’s smile faded a touch, but he didn’t move. “I know you’ve been traveling with Allen. I’ve seen that he has a plan. Tell me what it is.”

Lavi blinked, frozen in place as he stared back up at the 14th. He swallowed, feeling the pinch of the blade against his throat. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Oh, what a liar you are.” The amusement in the 14th’s voice sent a chill down Lavi’s spine. Even using Allen’s body, using his voice, he sounded nothing like Allen. “Tell me or I start using you as my new favorite pincushion.” To illustrate his point, he ran the knife blade over Lavi’s skin, scraping his flesh and leaving a score of red marks.

Sweat prickled over Lavi’s skin, but he held firm. He’d survived the Noah’s torture when he’d been trapped with Bookman—he could handle this. _He could handle this_.

“I don’t know. Allen never told m— _Ah!_ ”

One sharp twist of the knife nicked Lavi’s skin. The initial sting faded, but he felt the blood well up against the cut and dribble down the curves of his neck. He missed Lavi’s vital points, but the message was clear—he wasn’t fucking around.

“Don’t make me hurt you, Junior. I would just feel terrible about it.” The 14th shifted his weight, pressing his hand harder on Lavi’s chest.

There was a beat, silence filling the room when Lavi refused to speak. The 14th continued to watch his face, then hummed. “I can see why Allen likes you.”

He twitched. He hadn’t meant to, but he couldn’t help it.

“He’s harder to control now, you know,” the 14th continued, as if they were talking over tea instead of with a knife pressed to Lavi’s throat. “It was easier when he was alone. He’s so stubborn, but his friends give him an edge.”

Another beat of silence, then, “And how he loves you, Junior.”

It wasn’t the first time Lavi had heard the sentiment, but having the 14th say it, that he knew it as well, left Lavi full of emotions he couldn’t process. His breath stilled in his throat, tongue stuck to the roof of his mouth. Words failed him.

The 14th smiled, sickly sweet, and tested the blade on Lavi’s neck once more. He drew blood with a shallow cut, waiting for a reaction. Lavi held his breath, not moving. “Maybe I should kill you. If he didn’t have you, he would be easier to control.”

Lavi’s eyebrow twitched, but he said nothing. His solitary green eye stayed trained on the Noah pinning him down.

The 14th’s lips pulled up in a mirthless smile as he watched Lavi’s face. “Or, I could just hurt you… Hurt you so bad that Allen would be too guilty to stay.” The hand on Lavi’s chest slipped lower, nails scratching down his chest until his fingers settled over the slight bulge of his pants. Lavi sucked in a sharp breath, tried to pull away, but the knife dug harder against his neck and stilled his movements. “I’m sure Allen wouldn’t be able to look you in the eye after I ruin you.”

“Don’t—” Lavi tried to swallow, but the knife was too tight against his neck. He lost his composure, uneven breaths leaving his body trembling.

“Technically, this is Allen’s body,” the 14th said, groping Lavi more deliberately. It was a rough touch, unwelcome. “Don’t you want him? I’m sure you do… I’ve seen some of his memories of you.”

“N-No, I—”

“Allen and I both know how you like it,” the 14th added, cupping him tighter. Lavi winced and closed his eye. “You let Tyki dirty you. I’ll have to be extra rough, just to make it hurt.”

“I didn’t,” Lavi insisted, his hands tightening in the sheets under him.

“Liar,” the 14th said, his voice melodic as he nicked Lavi’s skin again. This time, Lavi hissed in pain, wincing hard as he tried not to move too much for fear of having his throat cut more. “It doesn’t matter, though. As long as I hurt you enough, Allen will give in.”

Lavi’s neck burned from all the shallow wounds, the cuts itching as blood dribbled over his skin. But the knife wounds were nothing compared to the way the 14th touched him through his pants. It left a disgusted shiver trembling up his spine. He couldn’t stop him, couldn’t move without risking a knife in his throat, and when the 14th began to undo his pants, Lavi knew he was fucked. He closed his eye and clenched his jaw. He only hoped it would be over quickly.

Then, in a flash, the pressure on his body was gone. He heard scuffling and the sounds of struggle filling the room. Lavi opened his eye, free of the 14th’s hold. He sat up in bed and his gaze drew to the two men on the floor.

Tyki straddled the 14th’s hips, one hand on the back of his head and pushing his face into the floor as he pinned his arms behind him. Lavi saw the 14th struggling with Tyki’s grip, but he couldn’t move more than a few inches.

“Get the fuck off me!” the 14th growled, teeth grinding as he squirmed under Tyki.

Ignoring the command, Tyki turned his focus on Lavi as he fought to keep the 14th still. “Red, get the rope from the bag.”

Lavi could only stare down at them, watching the 14th’s face twisted up in fury. He couldn’t see any of Allen in that violent visage, even with it being his. The 14th’s essence seemed to take over every cell of Allen’s being, and even Lavi had a hard time recognizing him. He was not the same.

“Lavi,” Tyki called once more, this time using his name. “The rope. I can’t hold him down forever.”

Snapping out of his thoughts, Lavi stumbled out of the bed, legs tangling in the sheets as he tried to pull free. He hurried to one of their packs and pulled out the rope—a short length of it, just enough to tie someone up. They’d carried it just in case of such a situation, at Allen’s request. Lavi had hoped they wouldn’t have to use it.

He had hoped for a lot of things.

Lavi untangled the braided rope, wrapping a length of it around the 14th’s hands until they were firmly tied behind his back. Once he’d finished, Tyki hauled him up by the knot and tossed him into a chair, tying him to the frame before binding his feet as well.

Standing awkwardly by the disheveled bed, Lavi watched as Tyki finished off the knots. The 14th struggled and cursed under his breath, but was otherwise immobile. Tyki stood a few feet away, watching their bound companion with a wary eye as he caught his breath from the tussle.

The 14th narrowed his eyes, glaring at Tyki. “Didn’t you know it’s rude to interrupt?” he spat, arms and legs straining against the bindings.

“You’re lucky I didn’t rip out your heart and make you eat it,” Tyki growled back, taking a threatening step forward.

With a chuckle, the 14th leaned back in the chair. “Touchy. Someone doesn’t like it when other people play with his toy, does he?”

The crack of knuckles against the 14th’s face resonated through the room and Lavi jumped back at the sound. Tyki had moved so fast to punch him that he barely saw it happen. The 14th’s skin blossomed with a dark red mark just over his scarred cheek, and Lavi knew it would turn to a nasty purple and blue before morning. The punch nearly knocked the 14th out cold, his head lolled to the side like a ragdoll. He didn’t speak after that.

Tyki moved forward, ready to clock him once more, but before he let loose his fist for a second time, Lavi grabbed his arm at the elbow to stop him. “Don’t—You’ll hurt him!”

Turning on Lavi, Tyki’s eyes widened, a look of disbelief on his face. “ _Hurt him?!_ Are you kidding me, Red? You’re defending him after what he did to you?!”

Lavi had to take a few steps back to give himself space. Tyki’s outburst was too loud, too angry to deal with in that moment. The backs of his legs hit the mattress, but he stayed standing, knees weak as he wobbled in place. One hand curled protectively around his neck. The cuts still stung. “If you hurt him, you hurt Allen, too.”

“Of- _fucking_ -course,” Tyki growled under his breath, turning away from Lavi. His shoulders stiffened up, shaking from the pent-up rage as he snatched a bag off the ground and rummaged through it. He said nothing after that, the tension simmering in the room like a pot ready to boil over.

Lavi glanced over at the 14th, and found his painfully yellow eyes staring him down. He shivered against the glare, averting his gaze and staring at the floor. He ran a finger over one of the deeper cuts on his neck, smearing blood against this skin. His throat felt tight. He couldn’t breathe…

“Sit.”

The command took Lavi by surprise, and when he looked up, Tyki was next to him, gauze and first aid supplies in hand. He did as asked, slowly sitting on the edge of the bed as Tyki pulled out the antiseptic. He tilted up Lavi’s chin with one finger and began cleaning the shallow wounds. As pissed as Tyki had sounded earlier, his touch was nothing but gentle as he disinfected each cut. The cold cream against his skin had Lavi wincing.

“I’m fine. You don’t have to do this.”

“Just shut up and let me help you,” Tyki said, exhaustion heavy in his voice. He smoothed over each cut and nick with a gentleness that Lavi wouldn’t bother with for himself. He could feel Tyki trembling with each touch.

It reminded Lavi of their encounters at the mansion, when he would mouth off to the wrong person and get himself smacked around for the effort. Tyki always seemed to show up at just the right time to help. It was no different now. Had he returned to the room a few moments later, Lavi didn’t know if he could claim he was simply “fine.”

After bandaging the wounds, Tyki put the supplies away. Lavi didn’t budge from his spot on the bed. His body felt like lead, heavy and immobile. Silence blanketed the room, and all Lavi could hear was Tyki fumbling with the bags. When he was done, he sat on the edge of the bed next to Lavi. He gently touched the small of his back before finally speaking again.

“Go to sleep. I’ll keep an eye on our uninvited guest for the night.”

Lavi snapped his chin up and stared at Tyki. However, his eyes were focused on the 14th, unwavering. “You haven’t slept at all yet. I can watch him,” he said, sitting up straighter.

“Sleep.” Tyki said nothing else after that, not even meeting Lavi’s gaze. But the hand on the redhead’s back smoothed over his hip, a soft caress that had Lavi’s heart in his throat. He knew he couldn’t argue anymore.

Without a word, Lavi crawled onto the mattress and slipped under the disheveled blankets. He turned on his side, facing the wall as he curled up into a ball. He felt the eyes of the 14th burning into his back, uncomfortable and intrusive. It made his throat ache and his skin crawl.

Tyki shifted his weight on the bed, but didn’t leave it. The warmth and pressure was the only thing keeping Lavi from panicking. When had Tyki’s presence become so calming? So comforting? He didn’t know, couldn’t recall the exact moment, but it helped his heart stop beating like a drum in his chest and gave him the chance to relax. Before he could put too much thought into it, he fell asleep.

 

xXxXxXx

 

Allen felt like shit.

He woke early that morning, sunlight softly streaming into the inn room and irritating his tired eyes. Consciousness came in hazy spurts, but he noticed two things immediately: he was tied to a chair, and his face hurt like hell. With a soft groan he pulled his head up straight, blinking carefully and taking in his surroundings.

His gaze was drawn to Tyki—sitting next to the small window and smoking as he stared down at the street below. He was oddly quiet, a pensive look on his face. When he noticed Allen was awake, he focused on him.

“Ah, look who’s back.”

Allen tried to swallow, but found his throat dry and sore. He shifted in the chair, testing the rope around his wrists. Heaving a sigh, he dropped his chin to his chest. There was only one reason why he’d be tied up like this. “What did he do?”

Tyki took another deep lungful of smoke, letting it simmer inside him before slowly blowing it out his nose. He didn’t answer right away, or even move from his seat near the window. It put Allen on edge. “…You want the abridged version or the play-by-play?”

Allen shifted against the restraints again. “Tyki…”

He stood up and snuffed out the cigarette directly on the window sill before turning back to Allen. “He attacked Lavi.”

Allen’s heart dropped into his stomach, the blood running cold in his veins. “What?!”

“Keep it down, boy. He’s still sleeping.”

Panic welled up in his chest, and he fought the bindings furiously. He had to check on Lavi, make sure he was okay, see what he did to him. “But, what happened? Is he—?!”

“He’s fine. Stop pissing yourself over it.” Tyki untied the knots at Allen’s hands and feet, freeing him from the bindings. His hands pulled free first, and he rubbed his sore wrists, watching Lavi from across the room with worried eyes.

Allen already felt the self-hatred growing in his guts, black and writhing like tentacles of dark sludge. “What happened, exactly?” Part of him didn’t want to know, thinking it would be better if he stayed in the dark. But if Lavi had been hurt, he couldn’t sit idly by and stay ignorant. He might not have been the one to hurt him, but it was his body that was used to perpetrate the acts. It left him feeling sick and dirty.

Tyki finished untying the knots at his ankles. “I don’t know what all went down,” he said, not looking up at Allen as he worked. “But when I came in, he had a knife to Lavi’s throat while he was grabbing his dick. So, what would you call it?”

“Oh, God,” Allen mumbled, feeling the swell of his last meal attempting to crawl back up his throat. _“Oh, God.”_ He covered his mouth with his hands and squeezed his eyes shut tight.

Self-loathing ate away at Allen, dragging him down a dark path he’d hoped he had strayed from since joining Lavi and Tyki on their mission to free themselves from their Noah memories. But life had a way of knocking him down every time he thought he’d had a steady foothold. Now, he couldn’t even trust himself to be alone around anyone. He was a monster. A menace.

Dangerous.

When he finally looked up again, Tyki was watching him with wary eyes, his face a strange mix of concern and disgust. It was weird seeing him like that, as if he had an ounce of compassion for his plight. Though, Allen figured that if anyone could understand his predicament, it was Tyki. He wasn’t the only one with another consciousness hoping to take control of his body.

“Did I—” Allen cut himself off with a cough, clearing his throat. He barely recognized his own voice. “Is it bad? Are you sure Lavi’s okay?”

Tyki’s gaze drifted towards Lavi’s sleeping form for a brief moment before he regarded Allen again. He chewed at the inside of his lip before replying. “He’s got a few scrapes on his neck from the knife. He was mostly just shaken up.”

While Tyki made it sound minor, Allen couldn’t keep the creeping dread from suffocating him. He could’ve hurt Lavi—he could’ve killed him. That sick feeling clenched his stomach again. If something had happened, if something _worse_ had happened, and Tyki hadn’t been there to stop him, Allen didn’t know if he could keep going with that guilt. As it was, the burden was too much to bear.

“Tyki,” he said, voice wavering as he stared at Lavi’s back, watching the steady rise and fall of his chest. He was still asleep, and Allen counted it as a small favor. He wasn’t sure he could face him right then. “If it happens again… If I lose control and the 14th takes over, just kill me.”

Tyki chuckled, low and mirthless as he moved back to his seat at the window. “You think Red would let me even touch you?” He shook his head, and scratched at his chin absently.

“It’s for his own good. If I can’t…. If I can’t control the 14th, then I’m useless.” Allen continued to rub at his sore wrists, focusing his eyes on Tyki. “Just end it.”

“That doesn’t sound like you, boy, giving up so easily.” Tyki leaned back in his chair, smirking over at Allen. “I didn’t realize you were so weak.”

Allen sighed, a sad smile gracing his lips. “I am weak, and tired. And I don’t know how much longer I can keep walking.”

Tyki let out a haughty chuckle, pulling his arms behind his head. “All right. I’ll kill you if need be. It would be my pleasure.”

“Thank you,” Allen said, relief flooding his chest. He knew Lavi would be against this arrangement, but it didn’t matter. It was for his own good, and everyone else’s. He couldn’t be a danger to them anymore.

Allen rubbed his face, and flinched when pain radiated through his cheek and nose. “By the way, why does my face hurt?”

“Because I hit you,” Tyki said, unashamed. “Well, I hit the 14th, but technically, it’s still hitting you.”

With a soft laugh, Allen closed his eyes. “It feels like old times.” He gingerly touched his nose and cheek testing the flesh for sore points. “Are you going to try to rip my heart out again?”

Tyki’s grin was less than comforting. “I might.”


	3. Forever in my Heart; Forever in the Dark

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> All I'm going to say for everyone coming into this final chapter is that I'm very sorry.

The boat headed for England was larger than Lavi had expected, but still full to the brim with passengers. Allen had managed to procure tickets and they were on board by the next night. The only boat they could afford was headed to London, and they wouldn’t arrive until the next morning. They would have to travel to Liverpool by foot, but they could figure that out later.

One step at a time.

Even if quarters were cramped, the main deck was near deserted aside from the occasional crew member at the later hour. Skies were clear and the sea was calm. They couldn’t ask for better traveling weather.

Regardless of their luck and good fortune, Lavi still felt ill. Ever since the night the 14th attacked him, he had been withdrawn. Allen apologized to him the morning after, in tears from the guilt. Lavi accepted, but that didn’t keep the unease from creeping into his guts every time Allen was too close.

He could still remember his face as he touched him, dark and sinister. The feeling of a cold blade against his throat haunted him, and even though the scrapes and cuts had scabbed over, he still pulled a hand to his neck from time to time, worrying over the flesh and recalling the ooze of blood down his skin.

He knew Allen didn’t do those things to him, that he wasn’t in control of his body or mind. But Lavi didn’t know when the 14th would decide to show his face again, and that alone kept Lavi on edge.

The confined lower decks were too much to deal with, between cramped quarters, the heat of too many bodies packed together like sardines, and the constant motion of the boat against the waves. Lavi slipped up to the main deck, taking in the fresh air and cool breeze. The tang of salt hung on the wind, and he relaxed, leaning against the railing as he watched the waves lap against the hull. Stars twinkled above, and the moon shone brightly high in the sky.

“So, this is where you ran off to?”

Lavi sighed, glancing over his shoulder and watching Tyki join him at the railing. “I didn’t think you’d notice.”

There was a pause, long enough for Lavi to grow uncomfortable before Tyki replied. “It’s getting harder to sleep without you next to me.”

The honesty took Lavi aback. “Sorry,” he mumbled in return, sliding closer to him. “I didn’t know.” He drummed his fingers on the railing, looking off into the water.

“Well, now you do.” Tyki wrapped an arm around his shoulder and pulled him closer. Lavi was flush against his side now, his warmth radiating even through his shirt. Lavi sunk into the embrace with ease. When did he start relaxing at the smell of cheap cigarettes? He didn’t recall finding it so comforting before…

Tyki’s next words shook Lavi out of his silent musings. “You’re scared to be around him, aren’t you?”

Lavi looked up, watching Tyki’s features against the soft moonlight. His breath caught in his throat, and he hesitated before answering. “…I don’t know what you mean.”

“Allen,” Tyki said, his name rolling off his tongue as if it tasted like sour fruit. “You’re still upset about what happened. You’re avoiding him.”

“I am not.”

“Liar. You haven’t said two words to him since that night. You’re afraid.”

“I—” Lavi wanted to deny it, but it was already too obvious. He folded his arms against the railing and leaned forward, unable to finish his sentence.

“If you’re afraid of him, are you afraid of me, too?”

“No. No, I’m not,” Lavi mumbled.

“You should be. We’re no different. His Noah simply fights for control more than mine.”

Lavi swallowed, throat tight. He still couldn’t return Tyki’s gaze, couldn’t speak.

When he didn’t respond, Tyki sighed. “You know… He told me that if it ever happens again, I should kill him.”

That grabbed Lavi’s attention. He stared wide-eyed at Tyki, body stiff and muscles tense. “What?! But it wasn’t his fault! It was the 14th’s! Tell me you told him you wouldn’t.”

Tyki shrugged. “Who am I to tell him no? If he wants to go out as a pathetic failure, I’m not gonna stop him.”

“No, absolutely not!” Lavi tugged himself from Tyki’s arms and headed back down to the lower cabin. Tyki didn’t bother following him as he disappeared back down into the hull, storming past the sleeping travelers until he reached Allen’s cot. Allen, only half-asleep, jumped when Lavi grabbed his arm.

“Lavi? What—?”

“C’mon. We need to talk.” He dragged Allen from his cot, leaving him to trip over bags as they weaved their way back into the hallway. Once they were out, he found an unoccupied corner, far enough away that no one would hear their conversation. Lavi pushed him back against the wall, glaring down at him.

“You told Tyki to kill you?” The words came out as an accusation, and Lavi’s dark glare demanded an answer.

Allen stared up at him, jaw hung open and eyes like saucers. “I… He wasn’t supposed to tell you.”

“Are you fucking kidding me, Allen?! Like that makes it better?!” Lavi ran a hand through his hair, fingers shaking. “You can’t—You can’t do that.”

The shock wore off from Allen’s face, and he sighed. “Lavi, I don’t have much of a choice. The 14th hurt you. He could’ve killed you, and I refuse to let that happen. My deal with Tyki is a precaution.”

Lavi felt the frustration burning in his face. He couldn’t believe the words he was hearing. “Your deal with Tyki is giving up! Since when does Allen Walker give up on anything?!”

“Since I almost raped you!” After Allen spoke those words, the air around them sucked from the hallway, leaving a dead, ear-ringing silence. He looked away, face strained as he tried to hold in his emotions. “I can’t… I can’t live with myself if I hurt you—especially like that.”

“Al, it wasn’t you who did it—it was the 14th.” Lavi lost the edge to his voice, and each word grew softer as he spoke. “I don’t blame you.”

“It doesn’t matter if you blame me or not. I blame myself. And if I weren’t around, you wouldn’t have been…” Allen trailed off, tears brimming in his eyes. “Lavi, I’m so sorry.”

“Allen, I’m not letting you do this. I don’t care if you think it’s the only option. I won’t allow it—not even as a last resort.” He grabbed Allen’s shoulders, pulling him into a tight hug. His earlier trepidations melted away after seeing Allen so distraught. If Allen was willing to make that sacrifice just to protect him, Lavi had no reason to hold back.

“You’re staying with me, Al. Until we see this through to the end.”

“Lavi…” Allen wiped at his eyes, hugging him harder. Lavi felt him tremble in their embrace.

“Promise me you won’t resort to that,” Lavi said, pressing his face into Allen’s shoulder. “Please.”

Allen nodded, still trying to wipe away tears. “I promise.”

“Thank you.” Lavi took a few moments to collect himself before pulling back and giving Allen a soft smile. “Let’s go back and get some rest. We’ve still got a long trip before we reach Liverpool.”

“Yes. Let’s go.”

They made their way back to the main cabin, and just as they reached their destination, Lavi caught sight of Tyki standing and waiting by the entrance. When he noticed the two of them, he grinned.

Lavi frowned back at him and slowed his pace. “Al, you go on ahead. I need to talk to Tyki.”

“Okay.” Allen passed by the Noah, not meeting his gaze as he crossed the threshold and went back to his cot.

Lavi grabbed Tyki’s wrist and pulled him back up to the main deck, the cool, salty air greeting him once more.

“Oh, out for a late night rendezvous?” Tyki teased, letting Lavi pull him to a quiet area of the deck. “What? Did you need me so badly that you couldn’t wait until we got back to land? I mean, I don’t blame you, but—”

“You told me Allen’s plan on purpose, didn’t you?” Lavi stared up at him, eyebrows narrowed.

Tyki’s cocky grin faltered for a second before he laughed and leaned back against the wall of the upper cabins. “Well, I didn’t do it on _accident_.”

“No—I mean, you told me because you wanted me to know. You wanted us to clear the air.” Lavi held his gaze, unwavering.

With a shrug of his shoulders, Tyki shifted his weight and avoided Lavi’s stare. “Why would I do that? I don’t care what happens between you two.”

Lavi regarded Tyki for a long moment, knowing full well that he was lying his ass off. Honestly, he didn’t think Tyki would care enough to even bother. It struck him hard, knowing that he went out of his way to help him, to make him feel better. Having that rift between Allen and himself was painful. Even with Tyki and Allen on less than stellar terms, Tyki still tried to mend their relationship— _for Lavi_. If he were even half as selfish and uncaring as he pretended to be, he wouldn’t have given it a second thought.

Lavi didn’t reply, and he watched Tyki grow uncomfortable under his intense scrutiny. Tyki shoved his hands in his pockets, looking away. He chewed at the inside of his lip. “If you want an apology, I’m not gonna give you one.”

“You know what?” Lavi asked, his voice catching in his throat as he continued to stare at Tyki. “You talk too much.” Reaching up, he grabbed the collar of Tyki’s shirt and pulled him down for a hard, deep kiss.

Tyki let out a soft grunt of surprise, but as soon as he felt Lavi’s lips on his own, he wrapped his arms around him, pulling closer. One hand slipped up behind Lavi’s head, fingers threaded in his red hair, while the other curled over his hip. He let out a soft moan, the sound reverberating on Lavi’s tongue as they kissed.

Maybe he was delusional; maybe it was all just lies he made up in his head. But Lavi felt as if Tyki cared for him, _actually_ cared. In that moment, he didn’t give a shit if he was wrong. It didn’t matter. All that mattered was that he felt loved, and he wanted to reciprocate that feeling.

They kissed for another minute before Lavi smoothed his hand over Tyki’s crotch, feeling him up through his clothes. Tyki sucked in a breath, the hand in Lavi’s hair tightening and pulling at the strands. He pulled away, with a gasp, grinning down at Lavi.

“You’re awfully forward tonight. Was I right about the late night rendezvous?”

Lavi pushed Tyki’s hand out of his hair, then went to work unbuttoning his pants. “You really don’t know when to shut up, do you?”

“Why would I do that whe— _Nnnn_!”

Lavi grinned as his fingers wrapped around Tyki’s half-hard cock, watching as he lost his composure from the sudden stimulation. Tyki gripped Lavi’s hip harder, nails digging into his skin even through the fabric of his pants. “That’s one way to shut you up, I guess,” he said, working his hand at a gentle pace.

“You’re such a little shit,” Tyki groaned out, hitting his head back against the wall. He smirked down at Lavi, watching him with hungry eyes.

Lavi didn’t reply; he didn’t need to. Instead, he slowly dropped to his knees, gaze fixed on Tyki’s. Once he was settled, he pulled Tyki’s cock free from his pants. Without breaking eye-contact, Lavi parted his lips and took him all the way in.

Tyki sucked in a sweet gasp, legs losing their steadiness as Lavi worked his mouth over him. It took only a few moments for him to grow completely erect, even in the chill of the cool night air. His hand settled into Lavi’s hair once more, gently tugging while still giving him all the control.

He barely fit all of Tyki’s dick into his mouth, though a little uncomfortably. The weight of it on his tongue stirred up hot tension in Lavi’s guts, and he sighed softly through his nose as he began to bob his head. In and out, in and out—Lavi dragged his lips and tongue over Tyki, his nose tickled by the dark hairs at the base of his dick.

“Ah, fuck,” Tyki mumbled, his hips thrusting into Lavi’s mouth, desperate for more friction. Lavi pulled back, nearly choking, and settled a hand on Tyki’s hip to hold him still before continuing to suck him off.

Tyki moaned, settling back against the wall as he took a few breaths to calm his blood. He watched Lavi work over him. “Goddamn, Red. You look so good right now.”

Lavi moaned at the compliment, taking Tyki deeper in that pass. He was getting worked up as well, straining in his own pants as he pleasured his partner. With his free hand, he undid his pants, fumbling with the button and zipper, until he had his own dick loose. He pumped it at the same pace he worked Tyki’s cock over, moaning louder than before.

A choked gasp escaped Tyki’s throat, and he bit his lip to keep from groaning too loudly. He pulled at Lavi’s hair again, watching his lips slide over slick, hard flesh. “Your mouth is so pretty,” he mumbled, “I want to fuck it.”

Humming, Lavi pulled all the way off Tyki, looking up at him as he continued to pump his fist over himself. He panted, lips red from the fiction of sucking Tyki. “I’ll let you, if you want.”

Tyki stared at him for a quick moment until the surprise wore off. With a grin, he grabbed Lavi’s hair and tugged him close, forcing his length into his mouth once again. Lavi let out a muffled cry at the intrusion, but let Tyki continue to do as he pleased. He relaxed his jaw and throat, and let him plunge in and out. He grasped at Tyki’s pantleg with one hand while he jerked himself off with the other, barely containing the moans that begged to burst free.

Tyki thrust his hips forward, breathing heavier with each movement. He kept a firm hold on Lavi’s hair as he fucked his mouth, watching the way his lips curved around his stiffness with heavy lidded eyes. “Fuckin’ beautiful,” he mumbled, biting back a deep moan.

It grew harder to breathe the faster Tyki moved in him, but he could hear the catches in his moans and the broken, muttered words as he came closer to completion. He whispered sweet words to Lavi, praising him and his mouth and his lips and leaving him nearly melted in a puddle on the deck.

Lavi was still working away at his own stiff cock when Tyki gasped louder, pulling hard on his hair until he pressed so deeply in his mouth that Lavi couldn’t breathe. He came then, spilling down Lavi’s throat with a guttural groan. When Tyki pulled Lavi’s head back, he choked on the last of the cum clinging to his throat and sucked down a lungful of air.

Letting go of his hair, Tyki ran his fingers down Lavi’s jawline, cupping his cheek with a surprisingly gentle touch. When Lavi finally caught his breath, he looked up at Tyki. The satisfied grin on his face sent a shiver down Lavi’s back, and he remembered then that he still hadn’t found his own completion, hand still loosely grasping his hard dick.

“Don’t stop, Red. I wanna see you cum.” He held Lavi’s chin tight in his hand. “Keep your eye on me.”

Lavi pumped his hand harder, working himself over with excited strokes as he stared up at Tyki with an unwavering gaze. His mouth hung open as he panted, his stomach twisting up in warm, delightful knots. He was so close, and the look on Tyki’s face struck him so hard, he was surprised he hadn’t cum already. Soft and lewd at the same time, Tyki watched him as a grin curled over his lips.

One of Tyki’s fingers stroked his jaw, tender and slow. “So pretty and wrecked. Won’t you cum for me?”

Swallowing down another moan, Lavi chewed on his lip and spread his legs a touch wider as he worked himself over. Precum oozed from his flushed tip, sliding over his skin with each pass of his fingers.

Tyki ran his thumb over Lavi’s bruised lips, sweet and gentle, before slipping it into his mouth and pressing it down on his tongue. “Do it, Lavi.”

He came with a groan, hard and messy as he spilled between his legs. The mess splattered against the wall behind Tyki. Lavi whined as he milked himself dry, leaning against Tyki’s legs to keep himself steady. Tyki slowly withdrew his thumb from Lavi’s mouth, then pulled him to his feet. Lavi swayed for a moment before stuffing himself back into his pants. When Tyki had fixed himself as well, he held Lavi against his chest and kissed him, lips hard, yet gentle.

Sighing through his nose, Lavi whined again, hands tight in Tyki’s shirt. They stayed like that for a long moment, just kissing and clinging to each other in the cool night air. Tyki’s hands traveled up his back, smoothing over his shirt as they kissed, and when he finally pulled back, he grinned down at the redhead, their noses barely touching.

“What brought that on?” he asked, hands still tight on Lavi’s body.

Lavi shook his head, swallowing down the lump in his throat. He could still taste the salt in his mouth, the bitterness of Tyki’s essence invading his senses. Three little words sat on the end of his tongue, heavy with meaning and too hard to spit out. He couldn’t take them back once they were said, and fear kept him biting them down until he swallowed them once more. “Nothing. Just wanted to, I guess.”

Tyki quietly watched him for a moment, eyes sharp and contemplative, before he grabbed Lavi’s arm and tugged him back towards the lower decks. “C’mon. Let’s get some sleep.”

Lavi could only nod and follow after, his brain and body numb.

He wanted to say those three words…

 

xXxXxXx

 

The old, abandoned barn wasn’t much to look at, but the walls were solid and kept the cool night wind out. They were a day’s travel from Liverpool, but after two full days of walking, they needed the break. They’d run out of money days ago, and were low on supplies, so the unoccupied barn was the perfect place to spend the night.

Allen dropped his pack next to the others in the hayloft, his shoulders slumped and weary. “There’s a town a few miles up the road. I think I can find some supplies and get us some cash to make the rest of the trip.”

Lavi crashed in the old hay, not bothering to lay out a blanket. He groaned loudly. “Al, you’ve gotta be kidding. Aren’t you exhausted?”

Brushing back a lock of white hair from his forehead, he sighed. “Yes, but it has to be done.” He waved away some of the stirred up dust motes from his face. “You two can stay here. I won’t be more than a few hours.”

Tyki regarded Allen with a raised eyebrow. “You sure you don’t want backup? I can help you lighten a few wallets.”

Already back on his way down the creaking, old ladder, Allen shook his head. “No, I’ll be fine. Besides, we don’t need much, and when we reach Liverpool, there will be more opportunities to stock up our supplies. These smaller towns aren’t nearly as lucrative.”

“Wait,” Lavi said reaching over to grab his pack. He fished out a sandwich, the last one they had left, and handed it down to Allen. “For the road.”

Smiling back up, Allen took the offered food. “Thank you.”

Once Allen left the barn, Tyki pulled out their bedrolls and stretched them over some of the more sturdy piles of hay. “It’s just you and me, Red.” He chuckled, flopping back onto the bedding. “Whatever shall we do.”

Lavi rolled his eye, but settled in next to Tyki anyway. “Do you only think about sex? Honestly.”

“If it’s with you, then yes,” Tyki replied, tugging the front of Lavi’s shirt until he was close enough to kiss. It was soft, nothing like their normal kisses. He didn’t pull away from Lavi, but he didn’t drag him in either.

Lavi expected more, expected to be grabbed and pinched and bit without hesitation. This sweetness took him off guard, made his heart flutter in his chest. Crawling on top of Tyki, he straddled his hips, their lips still locked.

Tyki’s hands smoothed up Lavi’s thighs, curling around his waist and pulling him closer until their bodies were flush and Lavi could feel each taut muscle against his own. Heat simmered low in his belly, burning hotter when Tyki slipped his tongue into his mouth. Lavi moaned, low and steady as his hips hitched up against Tyki’s.

Everything was slow and gentle, and as much as Lavi liked it, it struck him odd. This wasn’t how Tyki acted. A thought came to his mind, invading the pleasant chill that ran through him as they touched. He tried to push it back, but it stuck in his brain like a thorn. With a sigh, he pulled away from the kiss and sat up on Tyki’s hips.

Tyki watched him with confusion, hands still clinging to his waist. “Why’d you stop?”

Pursing his lips, Lavi paused for a brief moment before speaking. “Why are you doing this?”

“This?” Tyki asked, raising an eyebrow. “Well, I was hoping to have sex, but—”

“No, not _this_. This!” He gestured around them. “Why did you come with me and Allen? I mean… Do you even want to find this lady in Liverpool?”

They hadn’t talked about it, not once since they had left. The question had buzzed in the back of Lavi’s mind like a fly, but there were always more important things to deal with. He never had the chance to ask, to understand why. Tyki had never once mentioned if he didn’t want to be a Noah, or if he had any desire to remove the Noah memories from his consciousness.

With a sigh, Tyki rested a hand over his forehead and looked up at the roof. The setting sun glowed golden as it filtered in through the holes and uneven slats. “I came with. What does it matter why I did it?”

“It matters to me,” Lavi said, his voice softening. Tyki wouldn’t meet his gaze, yellow eyes fixated above him. “You know… You don’t have to do it, if you don’t want to.”

“What?” Tyki asked, letting out a half-laugh as he pressed his hand over his eyes to avoid Lavi’s gaze less subtly. “Are you trying to tell me you’d rather I left? That you didn’t want me to come with?”

“No! Of course not! I just—” Lavi sighed and ran a hand through his hair, thinking over his words. “I just don’t want to be the only reason you did it. If the information Allen got was right, this lady knows how to remove the Noah memories. It’s not like… like you can get them back if you go through with it. And if you’re only doing it because of me…”

“Lavi,” Tyki said, finally meeting his gaze. The look on his face grew stern, almost angry, and it gave the redhead pause. “Do you think I wanted to stay with them? With my family?”

“I… I don’t know.” Lavi swallowed, his throat tight. “Would you have?”

Tyki watched him for a long moment, eyes sharp and strong. Slowly, he sat up until they were face to face, noses nearly touching. “Maybe I don’t like the idea of losing myself any more than Allen does.” He reached up and cupped Lavi’s jaw, running his thumb over his cheek. “But I wouldn’t have left if it weren’t for you.”

Lavi’s breath caught in his throat at the admission, his heart hammering against his chest. “Tyki…”

“Shh.” Tyki hushed him, the hand on Lavi’s jaw slipping around to grab the back of his neck. He pulled him closer with gentle insistence. “C’mere.”

Their lips met, that same softness from before leaving Lavi’s heart in his throat and his hands clenched in Tyki’s shirt. He felt the tenderness in his touch, mirroring the confession. Lavi knew it wasn’t much, it wasn’t a declaration of love and devotion, but he’d never have that with Tyki. And this—for him to admit that he left his Noah family to be with him… Well, it meant more than Tyki was willing to divulge.

A whine crawled up Lavi’s throat as they kissed, and he moved in closer. His arms curled around Tyki’s neck and shoulders, hands tugging at his shirt as he pressed Tyki back down against the blankets. Lavi’s legs straddled Tyki’s hips as he chased him down, still kissing. A desperate heat burned in his stomach, deep and hot as he worked off Tyki’s shirt and tossed it into the hay surrounding them. He needed Tyki to know, to feel the heat turning his insides to molten lava.

He needed to show Tyki just how he burned for him.

Tyki’s hands slid up Lavi’s hips, under his shirt and tickling over skin. Lavi had to bite back a gasp as their hips rocked together with a muted urgency. He felt Tyki’s hardness digging into his stomach, just as stiff and uncomfortable as his own. Separating for a quick moment, Tyki ripped Lavi’s shirt off in much the same fashion as his had been disposed of, and when they leaned back in to continue where they’d left off, Tyki’s lips found Lavi’s neck with ease. He sucked bruises into his skin as he always did, and the wet sensation on his neck left him shivering. Lavi rolled his hips with a simmering want.

“Tyki, please. Please—”

“Mmm,” he mumbled, sitting up and settling Lavi into his lap. He kissed him once more, lips wet and hot before he rolled them over and pinned Lavi down on the blankets.

Lavi sighed as his back hit the hay, dust particles wafting up into the air and tickling his nose. Tyki shifted his weight, leaning down to press open-mouthed kisses over his chest. Lavi’s breath hitched with each touch, and he closed his eye against the sensation. He knew he sounded desperate with the low whines and mewls rumbling in his throat, and how he let his hips cant against Tyki’s with each touch and kiss, but he didn’t care. He’d been beyond caring for too long now.

Reaching out, he tangled his hands in Tyki’s long, messy hair, gripping the strands tight with each brush of lips on his skin. Tyki moved lower, until he reached the edge of Lavi’s pants. He undid them without pause, slipping them down Lavi’s legs until they settled around his ankles. Lavi kicked his shoes off and shook free of his pants until he was buck naked.

Tyki smirked down at him, palming his erection as Lavi’s legs curled around his hips. “Lavi, what do you want me to do?”

The knot in Lavi’s throat tightened at the sound of his name—his name, God had it always been his name and he’d only now realized it?—and it took a moment for him to get the words around it. He propped himself up on an elbow, reaching out to touch Tyki’s face, smoothing fingers over his cheek and jaw. “I want you in me.”

A soft chuckle escaped Tyki’s throat, and he pulled Lavi’s hand to his lips, giving him a quick kiss on his palm. Without a word, he reached for his pack, not more than a few feet away, and rummaged through it until he found the tub of ointment. Lavi’s heart sped up as he watched Tyki unscrew the cap and dip two of his fingers into the opaque salve. His eye never left Tyki’s form, focusing on his movements as he settled back in between his legs before slipping his fingers behind him with a cool, gentle touch.

A gasp slipped from Lavi’s lips as Tyki pressed into him, slick fingers knuckle-deep. The full feeling sent a shiver up his spine, but it wasn’t enough. He craved more, his hips already grinding down on Tyki’s hand. He sat back on his feet, just out of Lavi’s reach. Lavi wanted to grab onto him, but had to settle for the blankets underneath instead, gripping the fabric as Tyki fingered his ass with slow, methodical movements.

A grin curled up on Tyki’s lips as he watched Lavi’s reactions, his piercing yellow eyes fixated on the redhead. A deep craving simmered beneath the surface, and all Lavi wanted to do was yank it free, let Tyki ravage his body like he’d done time and time again until he couldn’t see straight. But his lover seemed to have a different course in mind for the night, one that would drag out this encounter for as long as possible.

Lavi cinched his legs around Tyki’s hips, pulling him closer. “Why are you going so slow?”

Tyki chuckled, smoothing his free hand over Lavi’s strained length. He teased the drops of pre-cum dribbling over the head with his thumb. “Maybe I want to take my time with you. Is that a crime?”

“No,” Lavi said, the word hitching on his breath as Tyki hit a particularly sensitive spot inside him. “But it’s frustrating.”

“Good. You look exquisite when you’re frustrated.” Tyki added a third finger into Lavi, stretching him wider. Lavi flushed hotly at the admission, turning his head to the side to avoid Tyki’s provocative stare. The smell of goldenrod and distant rain wafted in on the breeze slipping through the holes in the walls and roof. The sunbeams weakened as Tyki continued to tease Lavi, and he knew night would be on them quickly. They hadn’t eaten, hadn’t set any supplies up—they didn’t have time for these games, but Lavi couldn’t find the strength to stop him, no matter how sensible it seemed.

“ _Ahh_ ,” Lavi keened, his back arching as Tyki hit that same tantalizingly sensitive spot. It didn’t help that he was still fondling Lavi’s dick, each brush of skin on skin leaving him weak with desire. “Please, Tyki. Please…”

Humming, Tyki paused his hand on Lavi’s length before leaning over him, fingers still inside. He hovered close, lips barely brushing against the redhead’s. “Lucky for you, I’m in a generous mood.” Tyki kissed him, tongue sliding into his mouth, sensual and hot enough to make Lavi moan against it. He removed his fingers, slow and slick, dragging it out as long as he could. When they finally slipped free, Lavi groaned at the empty feeling.

Pulling away from the kiss, Tyki stripped off his pants and shoes until he was completely free of clothes, then leaned back into Lavi’s lanky form, capturing his lips once more, heated and demanding. Lavi rolled his hips up into him, hands grasping at Tyki’s back and long, messy hair. Tyki stifled a chuckle, then slowly pressed himself into Lavi.

The stretch left Lavi crooning, and as Tyki’s heat entered him, he cried out softly. His eye screwed shut, back arched against the intrusion. That full feeling ached inside him, sweet and tender, and as Tyki settled over him, everything felt _right_. He reached out, hands curling around the back of Tyki’s neck, and pulled him in for a forceful, longing kiss.

Tyki returned the enthusiasm in kind, running his tongue over Lavi’s lower lip before slipping it into mouth. His hips rutted gently into Lavi, savoring each and every movement. Lavi wrapped his legs around Tyki’s hips, crossing them at the ankles and easing him close until their bodies were flush. Tyki moaned into his mouth, his hips jerking forward with a needy thrust.

Turning his head to the side, Lavi gasped, his body rigid against the feeling. “Tyki…” His fingers dug into Tyki’s hair, tugging at the long curls.

With a breathy laugh, Tyki licked the redhead’s neck before biting it. Lavi twitched under the rough touch. “You’re sensitive tonight,” he mumbled against his flesh, sucking and biting the skin on his neck and shoulders. The bruises blossomed over his pale, freckled skin like red and purple flowers, each one uniquely shaped and delicate and tender to the touch.

“I just— _aah_!” Lavi cried out, hips jerking upward as Tyki nipped at a particularly sensitive spot on his neck. He clung tighter to Tyki, pressing his face into his shoulder. He felt his heart beat against his chest like a caged bird, desperate to be released. He mumbled his next words, fingers digging into Tyki’s shoulders. “I just need you right now.”

Tyki’s lips paused on Lavi’s flesh, the stillness just long enough for Lavi to notice. Insecurity squirmed in his heart, begging him to retract his words. They had been too needy, too real. But before he could utter another word, Tyki captured his lips in a breathtaking kiss, insatiable in his insistence. His hips thrust into Lavi with renewed vigor—faster, deeper, demanding, greedy for more friction and heat.

“Tyki. _Tyki_ ,” Lavi moaned, eye clenched shut as he let Tyki drive into him with abandon. He’d never felt so connected, so bound and drawn to someone. In that instance, as they writhed together amongst the loose bales of hay and blankets, fighting for mutual completion, Lavi surrendered his heart.

It had never been his to begin with, anyway.

A hand slipped between their stomachs, and Lavi felt Tyki’s fingers wrap around his hardened length. He gasped at the touch, and Tyki began to smooth his hand over him as he continued to work his hips. The friction and fullness was almost too much to bear, and he’d already been teased enough to cum twice over. “Nnn, fuck—” he huffed out, turning back to stare up at Tyki. Those golden eyes pierced into his, a light sheen of sweat clinging to his temples as he watched Lavi with unhindered desire.

A needy shiver rolled down Lavi’s back, and he felt his stomach twist up in delightfully tight knots. Tyki’s searing gaze only intensified, unwavering. A ravenous smile touched his lips. “C’mon, Lavi. Let me see you cum. I wanna watch you,” he said, out of breath and still fucking Lavi at that steady, fevered pace.

Lavi groaned at the words, Tyki’s name falling from his lips again and again as his hips bucked up into his hand. He was too hot, too aroused, energy coiled up like a snake ready to strike. And finally, with a few well placed thrusts and a gentle caress over his slick, red tip, Lavi came like a fountain, spraying cum over them both.

Buzzing from the orgasm, Lavi whined as Tyki continued to split him in two with his cock, still staring at him with dark, lustful eyes. He raised his soiled hand to his mouth, licking Lavi’s cum off the skin as his hips pumped into the redhead harder. The sight left Lavi shivering, wishing he could cum again in that moment.

Then, Tyki closed his eyes tight, cum slicked hand curling up into a fist. His hips lost their rhythm, erratic and fumbling, and Lavi felt the heat rush into him as Tyki came. He shuddered with pleasure at the warmth.

Tyki waited until the spasms ceased, and when he was ready, he pulled free of Lavi’s backside and joined him against the disheveled blankets. They were both filthy, sticky with cum and sweat, but the satiated aura that radiated around them made Lavi not care how dirty they were. This was what he wanted. This was perfect.

Lavi stared up at the roof, the sky already dark. He hadn’t noticed until right then that a soft summer rain had begun to fall, a few drops creeping through the broken boards and wide gaps between the slats. A smile crept up on his face, his chest still rising and falling with deep breaths.

“That was good,” he said, still staring up and unable to move his sore, tired limbs.

“It’s always good, Red,” Tyki replied, reaching for his pants and pulling out a pack of crumpled cigarettes and matches.

“No, I mean…” Lavi trailed off, not sure how to articulate all the feelings swirling in his chest right then. “I really liked it, Tyki. It’s never been like that before.”

Tyki gave up on his nicotine fix at Lavi’s words, turning back to watch him as he sat cross-legged on the blanket. Something flashed in his gaze then, soft and vulnerable, but it disappeared in a flash, replaced by a lecherous grin. “Even better than the time I had you on that table in the study? You were a pretty little buffet for me.”

Catching the distracting topic, Lavi shook his head and sighed, even with the smile still on his face. They were still playing games, still not saying the words in their hearts. He was just as guilty, so he let it slide, and changed the subject as well. “…After we remove your Noah memories, what do you want to do?”

Tyki stared at him like he’d just grown wings and flew off to the sun. “I dunno.”

“You never thought about it?”

With a shrug, he stretched out on the blanket again. “I didn’t really have much of a chance, now did I? We’ve been a little busy.”

Lavi hesitated, a lump suddenly sticking in his throat. He swallowed around it, not looking back at Tyki. “Did you… want to stay with me?”

Tyki snorted and rubbed at the tip of his nose with two fingers. “Stay with you and watch you dump me for that damned boy? No thanks. I’ve got my dignity.”

The accusation stung, and Lavi knew it wasn’t an unfounded judgment. He was silent for a short moment, picking his words carefully before speaking. “…I’m not staying with Allen.” He caught Tyki turning his head, watching him intensely, but Lavi kept his gaze on the roof of the barn. “I can’t fight in this war anymore, and I can’t go back to being a Bookman after everything that’s happened. Allen will go back to the Order eventually, I know he will. But there’s… There is no place for me in that world anymore.”

Tyki said nothing, still staring at him. Lavi tried to not let the unwavering gaze get to him as he continued. “I… I was hoping you wanted to stay with me. I’m not sure where we’d go or what we could do, but… I would like if you came with me.”

The silence between them drew out, and Lavi’s chest pinched in worry again. Had he said too much? Overstepped some invisible boundary? Just as he was about to backpedal, Tyki turned to his side and wrapped an arm around Lavi’s waist. He pulled him close, burying his face in Lavi’s bitten and bruised neck.

“I’ll stay, if you want.” The words were whispered in Lavi’s ear so softly that he almost thought he’d imagined them. Lavi shifted on the blankets, curling his naked form closer to Tyki and resting his hand on his hip.

“I want you to.”

Tyki hummed, one hand smoothing over Lavi’s cheek, then down along his sweaty chest. “Then I will.”

 

xXxXxXx

 

Liverpool stank of smog and fish as they ambled down the streets, travel weary and exhausted. They had arrived late that night, nearly midnight by the time the train rolled into the station, and Lavi was dead on his feet as he tried to keep himself steady. The main streets were well lit compared to most of the country roads they had traversed in these past months, but shadows crept along the edges of buildings and down alleyways. They met few people as they walked, and the quiet unnerved Lavi.

“Are you sure you don’t want to find a room for the night and start fresh in the morning?” he asked Allen, tugging at the collar of his shirt. The oppressive heat surrounded them like a warm embrace, humid and hot. Sweat soaked through sections of his clothes, unable to dry properly in the damp air.

Allen nodded, wiping at his face with the back of his hand to clean the sweat off his brow. “We’re here, aren’t we? I don’t want to wait.”

“I second that,” Tyki said, cracking his neck and letting out a long sigh. “Let’s get this over with.”

Lavi couldn’t argue with the sentiment. They’d been on the run for months now, trying to make their way to Liverpool, dodging the Noah and the Order alike. It had been hard going most days, dangerous and rough, but seeing the light at the end of the tunnel was like a breath of fresh air. A traitorous streak of hope surged in Lavi’s heart. He wanted it done.

He wanted to rest.

“How much farther is this place?” Tyki asked, wrinkling his nose as a breeze blew in from the port. They weren’t far from the docks and the stench of fish hung heavy in the air.

Allen scratched at the back of his neck. “Not far…”

Lavi checked the street names as they crossed an intersection. He never forgot how easily Allen could lose his way, especially in the city. “I think it’s just on the next block.”

With a nod, Allen brushed back the sweat slicked hair from his face. “The letter from Cross said that she lived in a tenement.”

Tyki scanned the empty streets, an apprehensive aura surrounding him. “And you’re sure this isn’t a complete waste of our time?”

“We can’t afford to ignore the lead,” Allen said, chewing at his lower lip. “It’s not like we have a lot to go on in the first place.”

“It just seems… Too easy.” Tyki adjusted the strap on his pack as they continued down the darkened streets.

“If this is what you call easy, I’m scared to see what’s hard.” Allen wiped a few drops of sweat off his nose and gave Tyki a wry grin. “Trust me when I tell you that I know this letter is from Cross. And he wouldn’t send me out here if it wasn’t important.”

Tyki snickered, “You put that much faith in him, do you?”

“When it comes to this, I do,” Allen replied, falling in step with Lavi as they walked a few paces ahead of Tyki.

Lavi took a breath, trying to shove the nervous feeling in his chest down deep. Tyki’s negative attitude clashed against Allen’s optimism and left him stuck in the middle, not sure what to believe or think for himself. He trusted Allen to not lead him on a wild goose chase, but he still couldn’t banish that nagging little voice in the back of his head. Something was going to go wrong tonight—he felt it in his bones.

“There it is.”

Looking up, Lavi saw the tenement—old, cracked brick set in even older, stained mortar. The uneasy feeling in his stomach doubled.

“Let’s go,” Allen said, heading into the main entrance.

The front door was unlocked, and as they entered, Lavi saw a long, dark hallway. Doors lined the walls on either side and dim lights did little to chase away the shadows as they headed through the corridor. The air in the building was stale and hot with no windows to bring in a fresh breeze, and Lavi felt like he couldn’t breathe as they made their way up the first set of stairs to the second floor. He read each of the numbers on the doors off in his head, trying to calm his racing heart. They were so close.

Finally, Allen stopped in front of room 204. He raised his hand and knocked three times, the sound echoing in the vacant hallway. They waited a moment, but no one answered.

“They’re probably asleep,” Tyki said, leaning against the wall and heaving a sigh.

“Al, maybe we should come back tomorr—”

“No,” he said, cutting off Lavi. “We’re here now. I want answers.” He knocked harder this time, knuckles rapping on the warped wood over and over again. Lavi took a step back, running a hand through his hair nervously and looking down the hall to see if they’d woken up any of the other tenants.

“Fucking hell—knock it off before we wake the whole building, boy,” Tyki grumbled, grabbing Allen and pushing him out of the way.

“What was that for?” Allen snapped, giving him a foul look.

Tyki said nothing, then walked forward and disappeared through the door as if it were nothing more than air. The sound of chains rattling and locks clicking open could be heard on the other side, and in a few seconds, the door opened to reveal Tyki with a smug look on his face.

“Ta-fucking-da,” he said, gesturing for them to enter.

Allen leveled an unimpressed glare his way. “No need to be so smug.”

“I prefer to think of it as ingenious.” Tyki smirked down at Allen, even after he closed the door.

Lavi sighed. “Maybe we can save the arguing for later. We did just break into someone’s home.”

Tyki glanced around the small living quarters and scoffed. “You call this a home?”

“Quiet,” Allen said, taking a few tentative steps into the room. There was a small living area in one corner, and a tiny stove in the other. The room was sparsely furnished, but neat and organized. However, there was a heavy presence in the room, as if something was off kilter—askew.

“Excuse me?” Allen said, loud enough for anyone in the apartment to hear. “I’m looking for Elizabeth? Cross Marian sent me.” Still there was no answer.

“What if she’s not here?” Lavi asked, checking around the room for any signs of life.

Allen shook his head, irritation plain on his face. “Maybe, but—”

“We’re not alone,” Tyki said, suddenly. His eyes narrowed, pushing Lavi back behind him as he stared at the doorway to the only partitioned room in the home.

Lavi went to complain at the rough treatment, but when he heard the light, airy laugh echoing from the bedroom, the blood froze solid in his veins. He watched as Road clapped her hands together, entering the main room, a sadistic smile on her face. Lavi flinched as he caught sight of her hands—covered in dark red blood. As she clapped, crimson sprayed over her white dress.

“Bravo, Tyki. So, you haven’t completely lost your head if you can still sense your family close by.”

Tyki swallowed nervously, but said nothing in return.

Allen’s breath caught in his throat, his hands clenched into tight fists at his sides. “What did you do, Road?”

She lifted her blood soaked hand and wiggled her fingers at him playfully. “Don’t ask silly questions, Allen. You know what I did.” She wiped her hands on her dress, smearing the blood over more of the fabric without a care. “I can’t have you breaking up my family any more than you already have.” Her cold eyes narrowed in on Tyki, and Lavi saw him visibly flinch.

“Tyki,” she started, not waiting for them to speak. “We’re all very disappointed.”

Chuckling, Tyki shoved his hands in his pockets, watching Road with an unwavering gaze. “I figured.”

“Come back, Tyki, and we’ll forget this whole thing. I’ve already spoken with the Earl, and he hopes you’ll return of your own volition. Don’t make me force you like I will with Allen.”

Lavi stared up at Tyki, fear gripping his heart like a vice. His throat closed up tight, the words on his tongue dying before they could be heard. He waited to hear Tyki’s answer with baited breath.

The shock was plain on Tyki’s face, and he faltered after her response. “He… wants me to return?”

“Of course,” Road said, her creepy smile softening as she met his gaze. “We’re family. We can forgive a few slip ups. You had your fun with the little Bookman, and now it’s time to come home. We’ve got work to do.”

Tyki scoffed, rubbing his hand across his mouth and averting his eyes. “I’m not coming back.”

“Tyki,” she began with a placating voice as she took a few steps forward. Blood trailed behind her, staining the floor in her wake. “He’s not worth it. He’s only human.”

There was a beat, heavy silence between them as the stench of blood wafted in from the bedroom. Tyki narrowed his eyes and grinned. “So are we.”

With a sigh, Road tucked a stray lock of hair behind her ear, more blood smearing over her skin. Her smile never wavered “So be it.”

Before Road could even raise a hand, Allen activated Crown Clown and threw his cloak up to protect them from her first attack. “Run!” he shouted, looking back on Lavi and Tyki.

Tyki grabbed Lavi’s arm, yanking him out the door as they beat a hasty retreat down the hall. Neither stopped to look back as they stumbled through the tenement and back onto the empty street.

They turned to look back at the building, but couldn’t see or hear Road and Allen’s fight. Lavi took heavy breaths as he stared at the door, taking a few more steps back. “Tyki, what about Allen? He—”

“I know, Red!” Tyki snapped back, clearly frustrated and upset. “We’ll figure it ou— _Shit_!”

Lavi didn’t have a chance to see what drew Tyki’s attention before he was dragged to the ground, the wind knocking out of his lungs in the process. An explosion rocked the block, debris skittering across the cobblestone streets as Tyki huddled over Lavi’s body.

“Look, Jasdero. The traitor and his little whore. They made this too easy for us!” Devit cackled as he pointed his gun at Tyki and Lavi, almost doubled over from laughter.

Jasdero snickered, his aim matching his brother’s. “Too easy, hehehe!”

Tyki got up off his feet, glaring at the twins as they haphazardly brandished their weapons at him. “She brought you two idiots, did she? What a pain.”

Lavi stumbled to his feet, disoriented and still reeling from the explosion. When he focused on Tyki’s line of sight, he saw the twin Noahs, both looking smug. With no weapon to defend himself, Lavi hung back just behind Tyki, his muscles tense as he prepared to bolt at a moment’s notice.

Devit grit his teeth at Tyki’s comment and adjusted his stance. “Shut up, traitor. You’re no better than that 14th!”

Tyki laughed, glaring at the two siblings as they continued to point their weapons at him. “You think you can fight me?”

“We know we can,” Devit snapped, his heavily charcoal-lined eyes narrowing.

“Yeah!” Jasdero added in, laughing.

With a smirk, Tyki attacked.

Lavi took a step back as he watched the Noah jump into action. Tyki was fast, almost faster than Lavi could keep up with. He’d fought Tyki before, back in Edo, and had felt those powerful blows wielded against him more than once. But to be on the other end, to see Tyki fighting against someone else, fighting on his side—it was breathtaking. Jasdero and Devit didn’t stand a chance, not when Tyki didn’t hold back. Lavi watched as he outmaneuvered them, knocking them to the ground together and pinning them with his foot.

“Still too slow,” Tyki taunted, a smug smirk spreading over his face. After kicking them once more for good measure, he ran back to Lavi, grabbing his hand and dragging him down the street. Lavi stumbled to find his footing, but followed after.

“Hurry up! We need to get out of here,” Tyki commanded, nearly yanking Lavi’s arm out of its socket. “They won’t be down for long.”

Lavi winced, struggling to keep up. “But what about—?!”

Before Lavi could finish his question, an explosion rocked the buildings and ground around them, causing them both to stumble. The side of the outer facing wall of the tenement broke open as Allen and Road fell out amidst the rubble. Lavi couldn’t see who had caused the break, but both Road and Allen seemed no worse for wear. Relief flooded Lavi’s body as he saw his friend back on the street and still with the living.

“Allen!”

Not waiting for Road to catch her bearings, Allen turned tail and joined Tyki and Lavi halfway down the street. “C’mon! We’ll make a break for the port. I’m sure we can find a boat to escape on there.”

Unable to argue, Lavi followed after, the three of them darting through the hot, dark streets in hopes of escaping their pursuers. They nearly reached the harbor, the smell of salt water and fish unmistakable, but as they rounded the corner, they skidded to a halt.

Road blocked their path, her sharp yellow eyes narrowed as she stared at them.

Tyki cursed under his breath, yanking Lavi behind him and Allen once again. That pang of guilt at being useless without his hammer burned in Lavi’s head once more, but he stuffed it down as he stared past his two companions at the one Noah that had brought him to his knees. Of all the Noah, Road scared him the most. No one else had seen what she had, or knew every crevice of his mind like her. He shivered against the memories.

“You should’ve brought more than Devit and Jasdero as back up,” Tyki chided, shifting his stance and readying to attack. Allen was in the same stiff stance, the Innocence in his left arm activated and Crown Clown’s cloak flowing behind him.

Road’s lips twitched up into a nearly imperceivable smirk. “I don’t need them to take you both back.” She raised a hand, rows of sharp, still-burning candles floating just behind her.

Allen gritted his teeth, fingers on his clawed hand twitching. “Let us pass, Road. We don’t want to fight you.”

Her eyes focused in on him, still as unforgiving as before. “You’re taking away my family, Allen. And as much as I like you, I won’t forgive it.” Road turned her gaze to Lavi then, and a shiver rolled down his spine at the coldness of her stare. “Though, maybe it’s the Bookman I should blame?”

“Leave him out of this,” Allen said, taking a step forward as he glared back at her.

“Allen, so touchy…” Road replied with a coy smile. “Looks like Tyki isn’t the only one with eyes for our little homewrecker.”

“Enough already,” Tyki growled out, hands clenched into fists as he stared down his niece.

She looked back at him, still cool and collected as she stood against the darkness. “You can end this, you know. Come with me. I’ll give you one more chance. There’s no one else to aid you in your foolish venture—nowhere left for you to run. Just end it and come back to us.”

“How did you know to find us here, anyway?” Tyki asked, still standing his ground.

Road grinned, only having to speak one name to answer his question. “Wisely.”

Another curse flew from Tyki’s mouth. “Of course.”

“What will it be?” she asked again, patience growing thin.

Unable to do more than laugh at their situation, Tyki shook his head. “My answer is the same as the boy’s.”

Allen managed a tired grin at his response. “And you already know my answer, Road.”

She sighed, eyelids lowering slightly as she took on a bored look. “Pity.”

Then, she attacked.

The candles flew at them like knives, slicing through the air with precision and speed. Allen threw up Crown Clown’s cloak, blocking them with the Innocence laden weapon before turning to Lavi. “Get to the harbor and find a boat for us to take. We’ll meet you there as soon as we can.”

Lavi’s eye darted from Allen to Tyki, then back again. “But—”

“Don’t argue, Red,” Tyki added, grinning maniacally as he stared back at Road. He let her attacks phase right through his body, as if he were made of air. “We’ll clear a path. Just get yourself to safety.”

Lavi looked back to Tyki, swallowing hard at the lump in his throat. That feeling was back in his guts, the same one from earlier just before their whole night went to shit. He locked eyes with Tyki, then nodded. “Okay,” he replied, voice weak as another volley of candles shot past them.

With a grin, Tyki jumped into the fray, attacking Road directly and drawing her fire towards him. Once the coast was clear, Allen dropped Crown Clown and hurried after Tyki, joining in. “Run, Lavi!” he called behind him before taking his first swipe at Road. She dodged easily, but with both Tyki and Allen working against her, she had her back to the wall.

Lavi took his chance, running past them in the narrow street and heading towards the port.

With a laugh, Road eyed the redhead like a hungry wolf. “Nice plan, but it won’t work.” She slipped away from her opponents without breaking a sweat, and darted towards Lavi.

“Shit!” Tyki spat, chasing after her, Allen on his heels.

By the time Lavi realized he was being tailed, it was too late. One of her candles clipped his knee, and he fell to the cobblestone streets with a cry. Twisting around, he faced Road as she hovered above him, deadly sharp candle poised and ready to fly. “Sorry, Lavi,” she said with a smile, and shot the candle at him.

Closing his eye, Lavi winced, readying himself for the death blow. He couldn’t run, couldn’t defend himself, and all that he could do was let it come—let it end everything. All the running, the pain, the suffering; it coalesced into an amalgam of self-loathing and bitter relief. He didn’t want to die, but the burden of living had worn on him for too long. So, he lay still and waited for it to end—

But it didn’t.

The sound of a choked gasp forced Lavi to open his eye and come face to face with Tyki, stretched out over him, arms shaking from the effort to hold himself upright. Lavi opened his mouth to speak, but before he could get a word out, Tyki groaned and collapsed against him. He felt something warm and wet on his chest, and when he finally pushed Tyki off of him and onto the street, the sight before him stole the breath from his lungs. The candle meant for him protruded through Tyki’s chest, blood soaking through his clothing and spilling onto the ground below.

“No… No, no, no…” Lavi whispered, his hands shaking as he touched Tyki’s chest and face. There was no way to fix this—the candle went right through his lungs, no doubt hitting his heart as well. Tears poured down Lavi’s cheek, lips trembling.

A sudden burst of anger shot through him. “You selfish asshole,” Lavi growled out, hands gripping Tyki’s shirt uselessly.

Tyki coughed and grinned, blood oozing from the corners of his mouth. “Sorry, Red. Couldn’t let her hit you.”

“You… You…” Lavi couldn’t get the words out. Blood pounded in his ears, his pulse racing and his breath coming in faster and faster, panic seizing him up. He heard Allen in the background, yelling something, but it was all washed and faded as it hit his ears.

Tyki was dying. _Tyki was dying._

Reaching up, Tyki tried to press his hand to Lavi’s face, but he couldn’t quite muster the strength for it. Lavi grasped it quickly, pressing his palm to his cheek. Blood smeared over his skin, mingling with tears. “Hey, don’t get all soft on me now,” he choked out, hands shaking and his yellow eyes glassing over.

Lavi sniffled, sucking in a shuddered breath. “I’m never forgiving you for this. You should’ve let me die instead.”

“A-And let you get the glory?” Tyki asked, his voice getting softer as the seconds ticked by. The blood grew blacker, thicker, and nearly covered the whole street. “No fucking way.”

A laugh made its way out of Lavi’s raw throat. “Stubborn jackass,” he whispered, squeezing his hand tighter. He waited for a reply, some quick remark, but the silence ate at Lavi’s chest. “Tyki?” He waited, squeezed his hand harder, shook him against the dying light in his eyes.

There was no answer.

“You.”

The words were spoken with such hate and grief that it left a painful shudder running up Lavi’s spine as he turned and saw Road. Her body was shaking, weak with anger and grief as she stood with a tear streaked face. She stared at Lavi, contempt in her eyes. “You,” she repeated, shivering against the pain of losing her family. “This is all your fault.”

Before Lavi could move or even answer, a rough hand grabbed him by the arm and dragged him to his feet. Allen pulled Lavi along and towards the port, feet beating against the stone streets.

“Allen, we can’t leave him! We have to go back!” Lavi insisted, still looking back. He could see Road collapsing to her knees next to Tyki’s body, and a fresh wave of tears rolled down his cheek.

“No time. If Road catches up, she’ll kill you.”

When Lavi turned back to Allen, his face was streaked with tears as well, the Noah inside him crying at Tyki’s demise the same as Road had. The lump in Lavi’s throat grew tight and hard, and he didn’t know how much longer he could swallow down his grief.

They rushed through the port and down the pier, looking for an unoccupied craft to hop on. When Allen found one of significant size that fit their needs, he hurried Lavi on board with him, as they scurried down into the seating area. It was a ferry that had just finished boarding. Allen deactivated his Innocence and once they’d slipped aboard without notice, they found a quiet corner to sit alone.

Lavi wiped at his cheek, trying to clear away the tears, but when his hand came back stained red, that tightness in his chest doubled. Blood—Tyki’s blood… Lavi felt the weight of his death hitting his heart, crushing him under the heavy sorrow. It wasn’t supposed to end like this. He never got to say goodbye—he never got to tell Tyki how he really felt. Grief and guilt ran through his body like acid, burning him, leaving him numb and dying inside. He bit his lip and curled closer to Allen, not caring how needy and desperate he seemed in that moment. Allen didn’t bother to hide his tears, and he wrapped a comforting arm around Lavi’s shoulder.

Still, he felt dead inside.

As the ferry began moving out into the bay, Lavi closed his eye and leaned heavier against Allen. “…What are we supposed to do now?” he asked, voice weak and scratchy as he struggled to keep himself from falling apart at the seams.

Allen was quiet for a long moment, fingers tightening on Lavi’s shoulder. When he spoke, finally uttering an answer, Lavi couldn’t help but let his tears flow one more time.

“Just keep walking.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And this is it. The end. 
> 
> I know that this isn't what most of you had hoped for, but tbh, this ending had been in the works since I realized I was going to create this series. After In Spite of Myself, I had become hooked on this story. I loved it. And though I started these fics out of pure spite, it became something near and dear to my heart. 
> 
> If you want anything explained or want to scream at me in the comments, go ahead and hit me up. You can find me on my tumblr, too. I also lurk around the DGM Wonderland discord server. 
> 
> I promise you all that I'll make up this tragedy with some ridiculous fluff later on. For now, bring me your tears and we'll cry together.


End file.
